Christian Faith Discussion

A Moment of Eternal Light (I)-Part 1 of 3

Introduction

I am not perfect, and even if I am a bad person, I still have people I love and friends I cherish. I can also talk about how I interact with my loved ones or friends I know. This is not something related to knowledge, it is just the accumulated experience of getting along with each other. Based on this reasoning, I wrote this article to describe my experience of how the Lord spoke to me through the Holy Spirit. I hope to leave it to others as some indicators for finding God’s dialogue with them. If someone encounters a situation like mine, how they can handle it so they can continue to walk on their narrow path of dialogue with God. Moreover, I have not taken a basic course in theology. The Bible verses recorded below are God’s responses to my questions that moved me through the Holy Spirit when I read the Bible daily. As 1 John 2:27 says,

“And as for you, the anointing which you received from Him remains in you, and you have no need for anyone to teach you; but as His anointing teaches you about all things, and is true and is not a lie, and just as it has taught you, you remain in Him.“

Please note here that the scriptures in the Bible were written by God through the Holy Spirit, inspiring the authors. Scriptures that come from the same Holy Spirit will not contradict each other, and will only complement each other, allowing readers to know God better. Therefore, don’t just read the scriptures in one place and say no need for anyone to teach you. And declare that there is no need to learn the knowledge of the Bible. It is because, in 2 Peter 1:5-7, the Holy Spirit wrote through Peter that we also need knowledge, but knowledge is not everything. It is only another part of our spiritual journey walking towards the Creator of the Universes.

“Now for this very reason also, applying all diligence, in your faith supply moral excellence, and in your moral excellence, knowledge, and in your knowledge, self-control, and in your self-control, perseverance, and in your perseverance, godliness, and in your godliness, brotherly kindness, and in your brotherly kindness, love.“

I will divide the following three aspects of experience into three short articles in this first part of the article.

Mentality, time, place, preparation and reason (this article)
Dialogue method of how God is speaking to me
Reasons and methods of identification it is truly from God

Mentality, time, place, preparation and reason

Mentality

Isaiah 55:11 records that the true God, who created the heavens and the earth, and all things in life, speaks according to the law.

“So will My word be which goes out of My mouth;
It will not return to Me empty,
Without accomplishing what I desire,
And without succeeding in the purpose for which I sent it.”

For this reason, the Old Testament, Isaiah 45: 23,

“I have sworn by Myself;
The word has gone out from My mouth in righteousness
And will not turn back,
That to Me every knee will bow, every tongue will swear allegiance.“

and the New Testament, Romans 14:11, the Holy Spirit also recorded the same prophecy sworn to Himself from the mouth of God through the apostle Paul – “TO ME EVERY KNEE WILL BOW“

Then we, the world, whether we are God’s people or not, will definitely kneel down to the Lord when God the Son returns to judge the world, whether in awe or fear. Therefore, in terms of mentality, we can learn to kneel to the Lord earlier in this life, pray for His mercy and grace, and talk to us. This is the same mentality as we hope that our children can have “Early Childhood Education”. The sooner we kneel to the Lord, the better. Readers can think about it, a person who has never knelt before God, what will he need to go through in the future before he will willingly kneel down to the CREATOR and worship Him? Moreover, I once recorded in the third paragraph at the end of “Struck Down, But Not Destroyed (Part 1)” that a missionary couple shared with me that kneeling down to pray and read the Bible can help us humans become humble and learn to listen to the voice of the Holy Spirit. For the above two reasons, when I am willing to be humble, I will kneel down, pray to the Lord, and ask Him.

People can kneel down in many forms. Some forms are more comfortable for the body. While others vary from person to person and are more difficult to last. It doesn’t matter whether you are comfortable or not. You must find the form that can calm your heart the most and make you most eager for God’s words. This is one of the most important of keeping your original heart and seeking God’s dialogue with yourself. As for ways to calm my mind, there are two. The first one is that the muscles on the back of the calf and thigh are close together, the weight of the upper body is supported by the leg muscles, and the Bible is read in the hands. See the example of this form in the below picture.

If there is a height-adjustable chair, it is also good to kneel on the ground and put the Bible on the seat to read. As for how long I can kneel. My legs will become numb and I will lose consciousness after about fifteen minutes because there is no blood circulation in my legs. So, when that happen, I will sit on the floor and continue to read the Bible or pray to God until my legs are no longer numb. If my heart is willing or time permits, I will kneel down again and continue reading the Bible and praying. If you are on a hard surface, you can put down a soft cushion to make your knees less uncomfortable. The second form is similar to the first, except that when praying, you will kneel down and put your hands on the ground to reduce the weight on your legs so that the legs will not be numb during prayer. See the example of this second form in the picture below.

Please note that the skin on your knees will begin callused due to years of kneeling on the ground. This is normal. If you are a person who loves external beauty, I just hope you can decide for yourself. I can only assure you based on Isaiah 45:23 and the New Testament, Romans 14:11, that the sooner you kneel before God, read the Bible and pray, the better. As for me, after repenting a few years ago, I prayed because my knees were injured, “Lord, can I still kneel down to pray and read the Bible?” The Holy Spirit gave me a promise: “Yes, don’t be afraid.“ Until today, I knelt down and my left knee started to feel slight pain. The Lord still protected me and I could still kneel down, longing for Him to talk to me. Don’t give up just because of external factors, ask our Lord to help us, bow down to Him, ask to have mercy on us, and talk to us. The worldly trauma in this life will pass. We can kneel down and learn to listen to the Holy Spirit talking to us. This is what I say from the bottom of my heart. It is worth it and the net profit in return is great! A man once shared with me that after a quarrel with his wife, he had strong thoughts of divorce came to his mind and he almost picked them up, but God’s words came to his heart like a wake-up thunder call, “What God has joined together, no person is to separate.” This is Mark 10:9, what the Lord Jesus said. Those negative divorce thoughts that came from nowhere dissipated from his heart and did not affect him anymore. This was a gospel power that changed the rest of his life! It was the same in my past. If the Lord hadn’t said to me in my heart when I entered my father’s house and prepared to take revenge, “Forgive your father, and forgive yourself.“ Then I would have become history. Details are recorded in “One Thought Repent Longing to Heaven (1)“. As it is written in Romans 1:16-17:

“For I am not ashamed of the gospel, for it is the power of God for salvation to everyone who believes, to the Jew first and also to the Greek. For in it the righteousness of God is revealed from faith to faith; as it is written: “But the righteous one will live by faith.”“

Time

As for time, for me, early in the morning, when my wife and child have not yet gotten up, and I have just woken up. After washing my face and brushing my teeth, it is best to be refreshed and mentally unarmed to prepare for the day’s work. And it is the best time to go to God to meet Him. As Psalm 143:8 records:

“Let me hear Your faithfulness in the morning,
For I trust in You;
Teach me the way in which I should walk;
For to You I lift up my soul.”

Until I repented a few years ago. from then on, at night before going to bed, I will willingly kneel down, read the Bible, and pray. At night, due to the day’s work, there will be more distracting thoughts in my heart, and it is the best time for the Holy Spirit to examine my heart to see if it is consistent with Him. As 1 Corinthians 4:4 says:

“For I am not aware of anything against myself; however I am not vindicated by this, but the one who examines me is the Lord.”

Place

As for the location, the Lord taught me Matthew 6:6.

“But as for you, when you pray, go into your inner room, close your door, and pray to your Father who is in secret; and your Father who sees what is done in secret will reward you.”

Later I discovered that while I was reading the Bible and praying, for some reason, my sense of hearing is very sensitive to the sounds around me, such as the chirping of birds outside, the sound of cars passing by, the sound of the phone ringing, the sound of receiving messages on the mobile phone, etc. Mute my phone and mobile phone, and don’t bring the mobile phone with me to the inner room. When I came to my inner room and closed the door, external sounds would be minimized. Only then I could read the Bible and pray without being affected. That is my private space. When there are no other people surrounding me, I can learn to express my inner feelings slowly to the Lord. I can be happy, I can be thankful, I can let the Holy Spirit review my past experiences in my heart, and I can be sad, I can shed tears and cry bitterly, it is a private space where only the Lord is with me. Closing the door is just the best environment. If there is no such environment, don’t be discouraged. In your heart, still keep the original intention of seeking God to talk to us. At any place, pray to your Heavenly Father in secret. He will definitely respond to you. As recorded in Isaiah 57:15:

“For this is what the high and exalted One
Who lives forever, whose name is Holy, says:
“I dwell in a high and holy place,
And also with the contrite and lowly of spirit
In order to revive the spirit of the lowly
And to revive the heart of the contrite.”

The true God, the Creator of heaven and earth, Himself has said that HE will dwell with those who have a contrite and humble spirit. Since God Himself has said it, HE will definitely do it, because according to Isaiah 55:11, His own promise is true to His words as Law in Heaven and Earth.

Preparation

The other four items I prepared were shared with me by a missionary couple and are useful when reading the Bible. Adding my experience to it, I need the following items:

A larger and good paper quality Bible
A pencil
A dark wood colored pencil
A floor or table lamp for reading the Bible

A larger and good paper quality Bible

A good paper-quality Bible can be used for decades. I need to take good care of it and preserve it daily so that God, through the Holy Spirit, can touch my heart and speak to me when I read the Bible. I can highlight the verses that speak to me from God for decades to come. During the years of use, I discovered that what God had said to me before would come true, letting me truly know that God is faithful. A larger Bible can record more feelings or understandings. When I am getting older and my eyesight is worsening, it will be easier to read a larger Bible. If the reader has never read the entire Bible of the Old and New Testaments once, I highly and highly recommend that the reader try to read the complete Bible of the Old and New Testaments for the first time. You should read slowly and do not try to complete it in only one year. This is my lesson learned. The process of reading the entire Bible for the first time is very crucial. When I finished reading the entire Bible in sixteen months for the first time, a large part of my fear and desire for God to speak to me disappeared because I had already read it once. As Paul said, knowledge makes one conceited. The self-confidence that I don’t know where it comes from accumulating like a mental flu. Making me lose my appetite longing for my Lord to speak to me directly. Even though I am still reading the Bible every day, it has made me lose a lot of my desire to focus on listening to my Lord rather than focusing on knowledge because I have already read the entire Bible once. I often long to go back to the days when I didn’t read the entire Bible for the first time. During that time, I completely let go of myself, not thinking about my worthiness or unworthiness, or being praised or ridiculed. I could only focus on reading God’s words, hoping that He would speak to me with grace and mercy. Under the light from the lamp, the surroundings around me seemed to be slowly dimming, and I could only see the Bible open in front of me and the lamp shining on the Bible. There is my private space with only the Lord and no one else. It is only through my self-confidence that I, myself, can ruin that space. If someone had reminded me at that time, after reading the Bible for the first time, my focus on the Lord might diminish. I would rather slow down even more and more of my reading speed. Because of this matter, I deeply regret it for a long time. I personally experienced the following combination of my feelings and the Scriptures are very true.

“So what if you are spiritual? So what if you understand all things?
John 15:4
Remain in Me, and I in you. Just as the branch cannot bear fruit of itself but must remain in the vine, so neither can you unless you remain in Me (Jesus).
Philippians 3:7-8:
But whatever things were gain to me, these things I have counted as loss because of Christ. More than that, I count all things to be loss in view of the surpassing worth of knowing Christ Jesus my Lord.”

But please readers, please don’t misunderstand. There is no medicine for regret in this world, but the true God who created heaven and earth has a way to help me. In the last few years, my Lord gave me indications on when I did not focus on Him again when I read the Bible. However, in the beginning, it was difficult for me to accept that those methods of making me focus again came from the Lord. So please keep your original heart, the heart that seeks God to talk to you, and slowly enjoy the process of trying to read the Old and New Testaments for the first time. Don’t rush to complete it. Just read God’s words every day and that’s good enough. If you don’t understand something from the Scriptures, spend a few days on those verses repeatedly over and over again, and praying in your heart, asking the Lord to open your heart and let the Holy Spirit teach you to understand what God wants you to understand. After I finish reading the whole Bible for the first time, I will write on another blank Bible page the date and year I finished reading the entire Bible. So that after I finish reading the Bible next time again, I can write the new completion date on that page with a grateful heart as my reference. Because a born-again Christian will never stop reading God’s word every day if his heart is in tune with the Holy Spirit with him/her. Just like when I talk to my wife and son every day, I may not always understand the things and feelings they encounter every day, but I will not stop talking to them every day.

A Pencil

A pencil is used to record the date and year of the verses in which God spoke directly to me. Please remember that next to the scripture, you can also add a few words about your own feelings and what learned. If you feel deeply, one or two sentences will be a good remark. The combination of those Scriptures and the remarks have been my guide for life. The first time I recorded the scriptures that God spoke to me was on October 2, 1992. At that time, I was just a new Christian who had not yet known how to confess and repent, and had not yet been born-again, but the Lord was already there moving me and speaking to me. My Lord Jesus is the one through whom I am praised! Because as John 3:17 says,

“For God did not send his Son into the world to condemn the world, but in order that the world might be saved through him.”

A dark wood colored pencil

A dark wood colored pencil, which can be dark red, dark blue, or dark brown is better, not black or yellow. It is used to underline those verses where God speaks to me so that I can remember what God said to me the next time I read that passage. Do not use ball pens or highlighters as they may get wet and make the scriptures behind them unclear.

A floor or table lamp for reading the Bible

The lamp can be used to pray and read the Bible in the inner room when it is still dark and the door cannot be closed. It can also be used to illuminate the Bible in the hall or other open spaces when it is still dark. The lamp only needs to be able to illuminate the Bible in my hand and objects within one or two feet nearby. When the place is dark two feet away, I find that I can focus more on reading the Bible without distraction. You can also avoid turning on the headlights, which may wake up your sleeping family members.

A humble reminder

But keep in mind that the dialogue between God and you should only be an intimate matter between God and you alone. Please do your best to protect those God’s words that are spoken in your heart. Without God’s permission, or as Psalm 131:2 describes it,

“I have certainly soothed and quieted my soul;
Like a weaned child resting against his mother,
My soul within me is like a weaned child.”

If you don’t have a peaceful mind like a weaned child, do not tell others about what God spoke to you. Just like a normal person would not say the most intimate words between himself / herself and his wife / husband to others. Only keep those words in your heart, as recorded in Luke 2:50-51:

“And yet they (Joseph and Mary) on their part did not understand the statement which He (Jesus) had made to them.
And He went down with them and came to Nazareth, and He continued to be subject to them; and His mother (Mary) treasured all these things in her heart.“

Conclusion

Dear readers, the above is my experience in reading the Bible, waiting and longing for God’s word to come to me. After my conversion in the past few years, it was just the mentality, time, place, preparation, and why that the Lord taught me to learn to spend time with Him. Even if readers can do what I share, it doesn’t prove anything. These are just the paths taught to me by the Lord. The readers can refer to the experiences I have left for their own path. It is up to you to ask the Lord to teach you. Don’t worry about how to get started. The Lord will teach His people, as Isaiah 35:8 says. Although I am ignorant and have no basic theological knowledge, I will not be lost. Our Lord will teach us. Glory to the living God!

“A highway will be there, a roadway,
And it will be called the Highway of Holiness.
The unclean will not travel on it,
But it will be for the one who walks that way,
And fools will not wander on it.“

In the next short article, I will share my experience and according to the Bible the ways the Holy Spirit speaks.

Next: A Moment of Eternal Light (I) – Part 2 of 3

Table Of Contents

Previous: Postscript – Assurance From Heaven – “I AM”

剎那間的永恆光照（上）-（一）

引言

我不是一個完全的人，而且就算是惡人，也會有所愛的人和珍惜的朋友，也可以談及，和相識的愛人或朋友，在一起怎樣互動相處的方式。這也不是與知識掛鉤的事情，只是相處累積的經驗。我是基於這種情理下，寫下這篇文章，述說主是怎樣藉着聖靈，與我對話的經驗，希望留給其他人，作為尋找神與他們對話的一些指標。若然有遇到像我的情況，可以怎樣處理，以致可以繼續走那條屬於他們自己與神對話的窄路。而且我沒有修讀神學基本課程，以下記載的聖經經文，只是神藉着聖靈，在每天讀經的時候，感動我，對我的疑問的回應。正如約翰一書 2:27所講。
「你們從主所受的恩膏常存在你們心裏，並不用人教訓你們，自有主的恩膏在凡事上教訓你們。這恩膏是真的，不是假的；你們要按這恩膏的教訓住在主裏面。」
在這裏請注意，聖經的經文，都是神藉着聖靈，感動作者寫下來的。那出於同一位聖靈的經文，是不會互相矛盾，只會互相補足，讓讀者可以更加認識神。所以，不要只看經文記載，並不用人教訓你們，便不用學習聖經的知識，因為彼得後書 1:5-7，聖靈藉着彼得，記下我們也需要知識，只不過知識並不是全部，只是其中一部份。
「正因這緣故，你們要分外地殷勤；有了信心，又要加上德行；有了德行，又要加上知識；有了知識，又要加上節制；有了節制，又要加上忍耐；有了忍耐，又要加上虔敬；有了虔敬，又要加上愛弟兄的心；有了愛弟兄的心，又要加上愛眾人的心。」

我會將以下三方面的經驗，在這第一部分文章中，再分開三小篇寫下來。
一，心態、時間、地點、準備和原因（這一篇）
二，對話方式
三，辯別的原因和方法

心態、時間、地點、準備和原因

心態

以賽亞書 55:11記載，創造天地萬物的真神，親口所講的說話，是言出法隨的。「我口所出的話也必如此，決不徒然返回，卻要成就我所喜悅的，在我發他去成就的事上必然亨通。」基於這個原因，舊約聖經，以賽亞書 45:23，和新約聖經，羅馬書 14:11，聖靈也藉着使徒保羅，記載同一從神親口向自己起誓的預言—「萬膝必向我跪拜」。
以賽亞書 45:23:
「我指着自己起誓，我口所出的話是憑公義，並不反回：萬膝必向我跪拜；萬口必憑我起誓。」
羅馬書 14:11:
「經上寫着：主說：我憑着我的永生起誓：萬膝必向我跪拜；萬口必向我承認。」

那麼我們世人，無論是神的子民與否，也必然在神的兒子，再回來審判世人的時候，無論是敬畏也好，恐懼也罷，我們也必然會向主下跪。所以，心態上，在今生能夠早一些學習向主跪拜，祈求祂憐憫施恩，與我們對話，這便與我們希望我們的兒女，能夠早一些「贏在起跑線」的心態一樣，越早跪拜越好。讀者可以想一想，一個從來沒有在神面前下跪的人，他將來需要經歷甚麽，才會心甘情願的向創造主下跪敬拜祂呢？而且我曾在「打倒了，卻不致死亡（上）」結尾第三段記載一對傳道人夫婦，與我分享跪下來禱告讀經，能讓我們人類能夠謙卑下來，學習聆聽聖靈的聲音。基於以上兩個原因，當我願意謙卑下來的時候，我便會跪下來，向主禱告，求問祂。

人跪下來，也可以有多種形式，有些形式會讓身體比較舒適，有些卻因人而異，較難持久。舒適與否並不重要，要找能讓自己內心最能安靜下來，最能渴慕神的話語臨到的形式，這便是守着本心，本心尋找上帝與自己對話的其中一種重要性。至於能讓我心安靜下來的形式，有兩種。第一種，是小腿與大腿後面肌肉，緊貼在一起，將上半身重量，用腿部肌肉承托下，手裏拿着聖經翻閱。

若然有一張可以調校高度的椅子，自己跪在地上，將聖經放在座位上閱讀，也是好的。至於究竟可以跪多久呢？我一雙腿，大概十五分鐘以後，會因為雙腿沒有血液流通，便會麻痹，沒有知覺。所以當我雙腿麻痹以後，我便會坐在地上，繼續看聖經，或者禱告神，直到腿不再麻痹以後，心若願意或時間許可的話，我會再跪下來，繼續讀經禱告。若然是在硬地上，可以放下一個軟墊，讓雙膝不會太難受。第二種形式，與第一種相似，只是禱告的時候，會跪下來雙手撐地，減輕雙腿所承受的重量，以致腿部麻痹的情況，不會在禱告的時候出現。

請留意，雙膝表皮會因長年歲月跪在地上，而開始起繭，這是正常的。若果你是愛美的人，我只希望你們自己去決定。我只可以憑着以賽亞書 45:23和新約聖經，羅馬書 14:11向你們保證，越早向神下跪，讀聖經和禱告，越好。至於我，在數年前，悔改以後，因雙膝有傷，我曾禱告，「主啊，我還可以跪下來，禱告讀經嗎？」聖靈給我應許：「可以，不用怕。」直到今天，我左膝跪下來，開始有輕微的痛，但主卻仍然保守我，還可以跪下來，渴望祂與我對話。不要只因外在因素而放棄，要祈求上帝幫助我們，向祂跪拜，求祂憐憫我們，與我們對話。這一生屬世的創傷，是會過去的，可以跪下來，學習聆聽聖靈與我們對話，這是我的心底說話，是值得的，是賺大了的。曾有一個人與我分享，在他與太太一次吵架之後，心裏出現強烈的離婚意念，卻因神的話，如當頭棒喝的臨到他心裏，「神配合的，人不可分開。」這是馬可福音 10:9，主耶穌所講的。那些不知從那裏來負面離婚的意念，才從他心中消散，沒有影響他。這是一次改寫他一生的福音大能。在我的過去，也是這樣，若不是主在我進父親家中，準備報復的時候，在我心裏對我說：「原諒你的爸爸吧，也原諒你自己。」那麼我也會成為歷史了。詳情記載在「一念悔改盼天家（一）」當中。如羅馬書 1:16-17所記:“我不以福音為恥；這福音本是神的大能，要救一切相信的，先是猶太人，後是希臘人。因為神的義正在這福音上顯明出來；這義是本於信，以至於信。如經上所記：「義人必因信得生。」”

時間

至於時間，對我來講，清晨早上，太太和孩子，還未起床的時候，自己也是剛剛睡醒，洗面刷牙後，精精神神，而且心裏還未武裝起來，預備一天的工作，是最好到神面前迎見祂的時候。正如詩篇 143:8所記載：「求你使我清晨得聽你慈愛之言，因我倚靠你；求你使我知道當行的路，因我的心仰望你。」直到我數年前，悔改以後，我在晚上，臨睡前，也會心甘情願的跪下來，讀經禱告。晚上的時間，因一天的工作，心裏的雜念會比較多，但卻是最好的時間，給聖靈測試我的心靈，是否與祂契合的時候。正如哥林多前書 4:4節所記:「我雖不覺得自己有錯，卻也不能因此得以稱義；但判斷我的乃是主。」

地點

至於地點，是主用馬太福音 6:6教導我的。「你禱告的時候，要進你的內屋，關上門，禱告你在暗中的父；你父在暗中察看，必然報答你。」後來我才發覺，在讀經禱告的時候，不知為何，我的感觀觸覺，十分容易，受身邊出現的聲音所影響，例如屋外雀鳥的叫聲，汽車經過的聲音，電話響起的聲音，手提電話接到訊息等等。將電話和手提電話變作靜音，而且不要帶手提電話在身傍，𨶹上門以後，那些外在的聲音，便會減到最低。我才能夠不受影響的讀經禱告。那是我的私人空間，在沒有其他人的情況下，可以學習將心底的感受，慢慢地對主說出來，可以快樂，可以感謝，可以讓聖靈在我心裏回望以往的經歷，可以難過，可以流淚痛哭，那是只有主與我同在的私人空間。關上門，只是最好的環境情況，若然沒有這種環境，也不要氣餒，在心裏仍然守着，那份尋找神與我們對話的本心，在任何地點，禱告你在暗中的父，祂是必然會回應你的。正如以賽亞書 57:15所記載:「因為那至高至上、永遠長存名為聖者的如此說：我住在至高至聖的所在，也與心靈痛悔謙卑的人同居；要使謙卑人的靈甦醒，也使痛悔人的心甦醒。」創造天地的真神，自己親口說，會與心靈痛悔謙卑的人同居的。既然是神自己說的，那麼祂便一定做到，因為以賽亞書 55:11，祂自己的應許，是言出法隨的。

準備

另外準備的四種物品，是一對傳道人夫婦與我分享，讀聖經時有用的，加上我的經驗，我需要以下的物品：
一本比較大和紙質較好的聖經
一支鉛筆
一支深色木顏色筆
一盞讀經用的座地或枱頭燈

一本比較大和紙質較好的聖經

紙質好的聖經，可以保證幾十年的使用期，日常要好好愛護和保存，好讓神藉着聖靈，在讀聖經的時候，感動我心靈，對我說話的經文記下來，以後幾十年的使用當中，我發現神以前與我所說的話，是會應驗，讓我真知道上帝是信實的。比較大的聖經，可以記錄多一些感受或領會，以後年紀大了，眼目沒有年青時那樣清晰的時候，閱讀一本比較大的聖經，會更容易。若然讀者從未完全看過一篇新舊約聖經，我十萬分認真的建議讀者，首次嘗試去看完整本新舊約聖經，要慢慢地閱讀，不要嘗試只用一年的時間去完成。這是我的經驗，第一次嘗試，看完整本聖經的過程，是十分十分重要的。當我第一次，用了十六個月時間，完成了看整本聖經以後，那份戰戰兢兢，渴望神對我說話的心，因為已經看完一次的原故，消失了很大部份。正如保羅所說，知識是會令人志氣高大的。那一份不知從何而來，因已經做到了的自信，好像靈性裏的感冒一樣，令我流失了靈魂裏的胃口，在讀聖經時專注於渴慕神對我說話的渴望。也只有那份自信，才讓我自己親手弄毁了，那與主同在的私人空間！讓我到現在，雖然仍然每天看聖經，但那份渴慕親近神，而不是為了知識的心，卻流失了很多。我常常渴望，回到第一次未看完整本聖經的日子。那段時候，那份完全放下自己，不去考慮配與不配，曾被稱讚或嘲笑，唯有專注，去讀神的話語，期望祂施恩對我說話的心境。在那燈光下，我身邊的四周，都好像慢慢暗淡下來一樣，唯有看到那面前翻開的聖經，和照耀着聖經的燈。在那裏，是只有主和我單獨的私人空間。若果當時有人提醒我，當我讀完第一次聖經之後，那份專注力在主身上，是有可能會減少的話。我情願那時，再放慢一些閱讀速度。我曾經因為此事，耿耿於懷，親身體驗我的感受和以下的經文，聯結起來，是十分正確的：「屬靈了又如何？透察萬事又怎樣？
約翰福音 15:4:
你們要常在我裡面，我也常在你們裡面。枝子若不常在葡萄樹上，自己就不能結果子；你們若不常在我裡面，也是這樣。
腓立比書 3:7-8:
只是我先前以為與我有益的，我現在因基督都當作有損的。
不但如此，我也將萬事當作有損的，因我以認識我主基督耶穌為至寶。我為他已經丟棄萬事，看作糞土，為要得著基督；」
但請讀者們不要誤會，這個世界是沒有醫治後悔的藥，但創造天地的真神，卻有辦法幫助我，在以後的日子裏，重新學習在讀聖經的每一天裏，專注在祂身上的，只不過那些辨法，初初的時候，令我很難接受是從主而來的。所以請守着本心，那尋找上帝與自己對話的心，慢慢的享受，那第一次嘗試閱讀新舊約聖經的過程，不要趕着完成，只要每天也閱讀神的話，便可以了。不明白的地方，可以用幾天時間，重複又重複的閱讀那段經文，心裏禱告，求主打開你的心靈，讓聖靈教導自己，去明白神想要你明白的事。當我完成了第一次閱讀整本聖經之後，我會在另一頁空白的聖經紙張上，寫上我完成閱讀整本聖經的日期和年份，好讓我在下一次完成閱讀整本聖經之後，可以存着感恩的心，在那一頁上邊，寫下新的完成日期，作為參考。因為一個重新得救，神的兒女，若心靈與聖靈契合的話，是不會停止每天閱讀神的話的。正如我每天與太太兒子對話，未必都可以明白他們每天遇到的事情和感受，但卻不會停止每天對話一樣。

一支鉛筆

鉛筆，是用來記錄神對自己說話的經文的日期和年份。請緊記，在那經文旁，也可以加上自己的感受，簡潔數字，若然感受深刻，一兩句也可。那些話，是我一生的指引。我最早記下神對我說話的經文，是在一九九二年十月二日，我當時只是一個初信主的基督徒，還未知道要認罪悔改，未曾重新得救，主卻已經在讀經中感動我，對我說話，我的主耶穌，是藉得我稱頌的！因為正如約翰福音 3:17所說:「因為神差他的兒子降世，不是要定世人的罪，乃是要叫世人因他得救。」

一支深色木顏色筆

深色木顏色筆，可以是深紅色，深藍色，深啡色比較好，不要黑色或黃色的，用來間畫那些神對我說話的經文，方便下次再閱讀那段經文時，想起神對自己所說的話。不要用原子筆和螢光筆，因為有濕透，讓背後的經文看不清楚的可能。

一盞讀經用的座地或枱頭燈

燈，可以在天還未亮，若是不能關上房門，在密室中祈禱讀經，也可以用燈，在廳中或其他開放的空間，還是黑暗的時候，用來照明閱讀聖經。燈只要能夠照亮手上的聖經，和附近一或兩呎範圍內的物件便可，兩呎以外的地方黑暗，我發覺自己閱讀聖經的專注力越強。也可避免開大燈，會弄醒自己還在熟睡的家人。

溫馨提示

但要緊記，上帝與你之間的對話，應該只是屬於上帝與你一起，親蜜的事，請盡最大的努力，守護那些說話在心裏，只屬於你和上帝的。若沒有上帝的容許，或者如詩篇 131:2所形容，「我的心平穩安靜，好像斷過奶的孩子在他母親的懷中；我的心在我裏面真像斷過奶的孩子。」那像嬰孩吃過奶後的安靜心境，不要對其他人述說。正如一個正常人，不會將自己與丈夫或妻子，最親蜜的話，對別人說一樣。只有將那些話，好好的存在心裡，好像路加福音2:50-51節記載:「他（主耶穌）所說的這話，他們(約瑟與馬利亞）不明白。他就同他們下去，回到拿撒勒，並且順從他們。他母親（馬利亞）把這一切的事都存在心裏。」

總結

各位讀者，以上是我讀聖經，等候渴望神的話臨到我，在我悔改以後，過去幾年的經驗分享。那只是主教導我學習與祂相處的心態、時間、地點、準備和原因。即使讀者能做到我所分享的，也並不能用來證明甚麽。這些只是主教導我的路，但讀者自己的路，可以參考我留下的經驗，卻要由你自己去求主教導你。不要擔憂，怎樣開始。主會教導祂的子民的，正如以賽亞書 35:8所講:「在那裏必有一條大道，稱為聖路。污穢人不得經過，必專為贖民行走；行路的人雖愚昧，也不致失迷。」我雖然愚昧，沒有基本神學知識，但也不致失迷。我們的主，會教導我們的。榮耀歸給永活的主！

下一小篇，我會分享聖靈說話的方式。

剎那間的永恆光照（上）-（二）

後記 – 從天上而來的確據-「是我」

Postscript – Assurance From Heaven – “I AM”

After reading the previous article, some of my friends gave me this opinion, “You said you heard God speaking to you. I have been a Christian for decades and can’t hear it. For what reason, shall I believe in you? Moreover, when you said this, some new Christians could be confused. What is the reason why they cannot hear God speaking to them but you? What was your intention when you said this? Are you showing off?” I hope readers can understand. I didn’t say that I could talk to God all the time. God came to me, a person who believed that the Lord Jesus is the Son of God, but I was lost and self-righteous, God helped me at the most difficult and helpless time in my life. It was only after I had got out of the predicament that I knew His call to me. As recorded in The Precious Blood of Jesus is covering me and By the Name of the Lord Jesus (Part 1). I was not sure either because I couldn’t see God. I doubtfully asked God in my heart: “Lord, is it you?” Then, through the Holy Spirit, the Lord whispering in my heart: “I AM.”. Only then, I had reliance in my heart, holding the Lord’s hand and walking out of the darkness. If you ask me what is my intention? Am I showing off? God just told me to tell the truth about the process I went through in my darkest days, because it was there that the eternal Creator saved me. Most people, when they want to show off themselves, always use the times or results when they are the brightest and can best show their happiness or ability than others to prove themselves or show off to others. This does not mean that everyone is showing off. Only those who enjoy it very much in a state of mind at that moment, or to put it more directly, their souls are so high like smoking marijuana to the brain. There are also some people who go to the other extreme and tell others their most disgraceful things, as if this can prove that they are more candid than others. Am I the other extreme? Even I don’t know it myself, and I know that my God knows everything about me. He alone can judge and rebuke me, just as the Holy Spirit taught Paul, so that he said in 1 Corinthians 4:4, “For I am not aware of anything against myself; however I am not vindicated by this, but the one who examines me is the Lord.“

If the Holy Spirit is willing to bear witness in the heart of the readers, I am the man who was once possessed by a demon and was sent by the Lord to preach in the house of God as recorded in Mark 5:18-19: “Go home to your people and report to them what great things the Lord has done for you, and how He had mercy on you.” Sharing with them the good news that God is eternally alive and is still personally saving sinners today. He is still preaching to the children of God that a sinner who is changed from death by relying on the precious blood and name of the Lord, confesses his sins and repent. His transgressions forgiven is more rejoicing than ninety-nine righteous people who do not need to repent. The Lord does not need to seek advice with anyone. He does not save sinners after being approved by others. Let us fear God and give glory to our living Creator. Why should we only focus on ourselves and not give glory to our Lord Jesus because the Word of God comes to a sinner and pulls him out of the mire of sin? A brother who shared with me that he almost decided for divorce after a fight with his wife as the negative feeling of divorce was so strong in his mind until Holy Spirit told him directly that “What God has joined together, no person is to separate.” Then, the negative feeling was disappeared from his heart. It is the reader’s choice to accept whether God is still talking to His children directly or not today. I will just suggest to the readers not to use your own believe to influence others as some other children of God may need the direct guidance from the Holy Spirit to get out of hardship or walk out of darkness from the Evil one.

I am an engineer, and one of the learning spirits of an engineer’s thinking is to “boldly assume and carefully verify” the things or things discovered. I think this is also the attitude a person should have in the world. If I hadn’t found the time when God had a conversation with me in my memories, such as the experience of hearing the Holy Spirit spoke in my heart for the first time recorded in “Struck down, but not destroyed (Part 1 of 4)”. Then, I boldly assumed that God still communicating with us humans through various channels today. I will not look for the pattern of His dialogue with me. Why search for it? All I care is that I have received salvation. That’s because I have doubts, I know full well that I’m not sure, so I want proof to search for the truth. This is the spirit of “carefully seeking verification.” After I repented, I began to realize that precisely because of humbly searching and unintentional mistakes, which corresponded to the Lord’s promises in the Bible, the Lord opened the door and allowed me to find Him. As recorded in Luke 11:10-13 and Hebrews 11:6:

“For everyone who asks receives, and the one who seeks finds, and to the one who knocks, it will be opened. Now which one of you fathers will his son ask for a fish, and instead of a fish, he will give him a snake? Or he will even ask for an egg, and his father will give him a scorpion? So if you, despite being evil, know how to give good gifts to your children, how much more will your heavenly Father give the Holy Spirit to those who ask Him?“

“And without faith it is impossible to please HIM, for the one who comes to God must believe that HE exists, and that HE proves to be One who rewards those who seek HIM.“

My Master called me to say this to those Christians who do not believe that God is still speaking directly to his disciples today. In the hope that someone will seek HIM, and that those who seek God will continue to take steps to find HIM.

The true God of the Trinity, who created the heaven and the earth, is my master. If I just said the above words to you, I would only ask you to find God yourself and not share with the readers how God taught me and my experience of the guidance of the Holy Spirit in my heart. The readers can simply ignore what I said. I will share with you my lesson learned. I am doing it only with the hope that the unique channel that God helped me to establish can be an insight for the readers to find their own channel with the Creator of the Universes. I hope more people will not take the wrong path and find the right direction to reach our God.

I originally wanted to leave my experiences on the spiritual journey to my wife and son alone. There are some things that they do not understand now. I often pray to the Lord, hoping that one day, they will understand. But I cannot say it in full directly to them now, so the next article is the most precious experience in my life of being found by the Lord. Only by thinking of my family, I can retain these experiences. As for why I first wrote down such a valuable experience on the Internet, it is because the Holy Spirit once reminded me: “Your life experiences are used to glorify me. As long as you abandon evil and choose good, I will have glory.” He also called me through Luke 12:48b: “From everyone who has been given much, much will be demanded; and to whom they entrusted much, of him they will ask all the more.” At that time, because it occurred to me in my heart, how did the Lord save me from the evil one? This experience of Holy Spirit spoke to me is based on the teaching of John 14:26, how the Holy Spirit calls people.
“But the Helper, the Holy Spirit whom the Father will send in My name, He will teach you all things, and remind you of all that I said to you.”

Only then, I am sharing my experience of how the Lord saved me and how the Lord got along with me, and let the world know about it. Maybe someone will search for the eternal true God who created the heaven and earth. As long as one person searches for the Lord, I will have joy. I hope that person, will not like me, can find the right direction in the process of searching for God because of the indicators I left, and does not have to take too many wrong paths.

In the next article “Moment of Eternal Light shining upon us”, it will be divided into three small parts. The first part will share the experience and understanding of communion with God. The most important thing is how to distinguish from the many thoughts that appear in the heart those that are truly from God. The thoughts that came to me, which ones were not, and how God gave me the affirmative answer from my daily reading of the Bible, that I was going in the right direction. The second part, sharing the call of the Holy Spirit to me, corrected my most erroneous thoughts in the past, so I didn’t know it when I passed by the Holy Spirit. Also, I will ask Heavenly Father, through the Holy Spirit, to personally work in the hearts of readers. Witness what one of the most important ways of His calling to the world is like and what things may come to mind when He speaks to us. The third part is about the changes and motivation in the soul after being healed by the Lord through repentance. Moreover, every day is a new day. You must not dwell on the past experience but start it over every day.

Finally, I can feel the confusion in the reader’s heart about God being able to communicate directly with the world, but the road goes on and on. No one can really help you but yourself. I can only point out the indicators, not the final destination of your spiritual journey. Only by believing will the Lord Jesus make a way for those who are looking for Him and let them find Him. Only by kneeling before God and moving forward courageously can we clear away the fog and see God’s true call to us. Go, those who are looking for God to talk to you personally. There are a long path waiting for you to walk on your own. You just need to remember that at any time, keep your original intention, the original intention of searching for the truth God. Don’t just feel satisfied that you are already affirmed by Christians in your local church, so you just stay in feeling good about yourself and stopped on a highway exit and not going to reach your destination again. Because Proverbs 27:21 records:

“The crucible is for silver and the furnace for gold,
And each is tested by the praise accorded him.“

Next: A Moment of Eternal Light (I) – Part 1 of 3

Table Of Contents

Previous: Assurance From Heaven – “I AM”

後記 – 從天上而來的確據-「是我」

有一些朋友，閱讀完上一篇文章後，給我的意見是，「你說自己聽到神與你說話，我做了幾十年的基督徒，也聽不到，你問我點解要相信你？而且你這樣講，會令一些初信主的基督徒，有疑惑，究竟點解自己聽唔到？你這樣講，其實你心裏面有什麼目的？在炫耀嗎？」我希望讀者能夠明白，我沒有說自己無時無刻，能夠與上帝對話，只是上帝在我人生裏，最困難無助的時候，找上我這相信主耶穌是神的兒子，但又迷途自以為是的人，幫一幫我，走出困局，我才知道祂對我的呼喚。就像在求主寶血遮蓋我和奉主耶穌的名（上）所記載的。我也是不肯定，因看不見神，我才疑惑的在心裏求問神：「主，是祢嗎？」然後，主才籍着聖靈在我心裏對我說：「是我。」，我的心裏才有了倚靠，拖着主的手，走出黑暗。若你問我有甚麽目的？是在炫耀嗎？上帝只是吩咐我，將自己最黑暗的日子裏，所經歷祂的過程，沒有隱瞞的說出來，因為在那裏，永生的創造主，拯救了我。大部分的人，要炫耀自己，總是將自己最光亮，最能顯出自己幸福或能力比其他人強的時光或結果，拿出來向人證明自己或炫耀的。這不是說每一個也是拿出來炫耀，只有那些人說或刋登的那一剎那，精神狀態，或者更直接的說，靈魂裏好像吸食大麻上腦一般，十分享受的人，才是。也有一些人，走向另一個極端，將自己最不光彩的事情，拿出來對人講，好像這樣，能夠證明自己比別人更坦白一樣。究竟我是否那另一個極端的人呢？連我自己也不知道，但我知道，我的上帝，祂知道我的一切，也只有祂才可以審判和責備教導我，就像聖靈教導保羅，以致他在哥林多前書 4:4 所記載的：「我雖不覺得自己有錯，卻也不能因此得以稱義；但判斷我的乃是主。」

若聖靈願意在讀者心裏，同作見證，我便是那一個在馬可福音 5:18-19中，所記載的，那從前被鬼附着的人，被主差派到神的家裏宣講：「你回家去，到你的親屬那裏，將主為你所做的是何等大的事，是怎樣憐憫你，都告訴他們。」要將神是永遠活着，今天仍然親身去拯救罪人的好消息，向神的兒女，宣講一個犯罪的人，從死裏靠着主的寳血和名字，得以改變過來，認罪悔改，過犯得以赦免，比九十九個不用悔改的義人歡喜更大。主更不需要同任何人相量，經別人審批後，才可以拯救罪人。讓我們會敬畏上帝，歸榮耀給永活的創造主。為何要因為一個罪人，因為神的話語臨到他，將他從罪惡的汚泥中，被拉出來，而只專注於自己，不歸榮耀給我們的主耶穌呢？

我是一個工程師，工程師的思維，其中一個學習精神，是要對發現的東西或事情，要「大膽假設，小心求證」。我想，這也是一個人，在世上應該有的態度。若不是在回憶中，找到上帝與我對話溝通的時候，例如記載在「打倒了，卻不致死亡（上）」中，我第一次聽到聖靈在我心裏說話的經歷。然後，大膽假設上帝今天仍然籍着各種途徑與我們人類溝通，我便不會去尋找祂與我對話的模式了。何必要尋找呢？都已經得着了救恩。那是因為心存懷疑，心知肚明不肯定，所以要求證，所以要尋找。這便是「小心求證」的精神了。到了悔改以後，我才開始體會到，正因為虛心的尋找，無意中誤打誤撞，對應了主在聖經中的應許，主便開門，讓我找到祂了。正如路加福音 11:10-13，和希伯來書 11:6所記載的一樣：

「因為，凡祈求的，就得着；尋找的，就尋見；叩門的，就給他開門。你們中間作父親的，誰有兒子求餅，反給他石頭呢？求魚，反拿蛇當魚給他呢？求雞蛋，反給他蠍子呢？你們雖然不好，尚且知道拿好東西給兒女；何況天父，豈不更將聖靈給求他的人嗎？」

「人非有信，就不能得神的喜悅；因為到神面前來的人必須信有神，且信他賞賜那尋求他的人。」

但我的主人，卻要我對那些不相信上帝今天仍然對門徒對話的基督徒，說這一番話，希望有人會尋找祂，讓尋找上帝的人，繼續邁開步伐尋找祂。

創造天地，三位一體的真神，是我的主人，我若然只是對你們說以上的一番說話，只叫你們自己去尋找上帝，卻不將上帝怎樣教導我，從以前將聖靈的引導，在心裏出現，卻又不曉得的經歷，與你們分享，希望有更多的人，不要走錯冤枉路，可以找對方向。若然不是，讀者們，也可以不用理會我了。

我靈程路上的經歷，原本只想留下給我的太太和兒子，有些事情，他們現在不會明白，我常常求主，希望有一天，他們能明白。但現在又不能盡言，所以下一篇文章，是我一生中被主找到我，最寶貴的經驗。也只有想着他們，我才能將這些經驗留下來。至於為何將這樣寶貴的經驗，首先寫下來在互聯網上，這是因為聖靈，曾提醒我：「你一生的經歷，是用來榮耀我的。你只要棄惡擇善，我便有榮耀。」更藉着路加福音 12:48呼喚我：「因為多給誰，就向誰多取；多託誰，就向誰多要。」我那時因為心裏浮現，主怎樣將我從那惡者手裏拯救出來的經歷，這是照着約翰福音 14:26的教導，聖靈怎樣呼喚人的方法所講的。
「但保惠師，就是父因我的名所要差來的聖靈，他要將一切的事指教你們，並且要叫你們想起我對你們所說的一切話。」

我才會寫下主拯救我，主怎樣和我相處的經歷，給世人知道，或者有人會尋找創造天地永活的真神，只要有一個人去尋找主，我也是快樂的。我希望那一個人，不要像我一樣，能在尋找上帝的過程中，因我留下的指標，找到正確的方向，不用走太多的冤枉路。

在下一篇「剎那間的永恆光照」，會分開三小部份，第一部分享與神相交的經驗和體會，最緊要的是，怎樣從心裏出現衆多的意念中，分辨那些才是真正從神而來的意念，那些不是，還有，神怎樣從我每天閱讀聖經裏，給予我肯定的答案，是走對了方向。第二部，分享聖𩆜對我的呼喚，糾正我以前最錯誤的思想，從而與聖靈擦身而過也不知道，還有，我會求天父，籍着聖靈，親自在讀者們心中，見證祂向世人呼喚的其中一個最重要的方法，是怎樣的，會有甚麼事情，可能會在心裏出現。第三部，是被主從悔改得醫治後，靈魂裏的改變和動力，而且每一天也是新的，不可留戀過去，要重新開始每一天。

最後，我能感受到讀者的内心，對上帝能與世人直接對話的困惑，但路要一直走下去，沒有人能够帮你，我也只能說出指標，並不是終點。只有相信，主耶穌會讓尋找祂的人開路，讓人尋見祂。跪在上帝面前，勇往直前，才能撥開迷霧，看到上帝對自己真正的呼喚。去吧，尋找上帝與人對話的人，有很多路等你自己去前行，你只需要記住，無論何時，守住你的本心，那份尋找上帝的本心，不要因為在教會當中，被其他人肯定，因此停留在自我感覺良好當中，便可以了。因為箴言 27:21記載：
「鼎為煉銀，爐為煉金，人的稱讚也試煉人。」

剎那間的永恆光照（上）-（一）

從天上而來的確據 -「是我」

Assurance From Heaven – “I AM”

This week, in the Bible study class at church, the teacher mentioned that “I AM” is the title used by God to refer to Himself. I am filled with gratitude to God!

It has been more than thirty years since I accepted the Lord Jesus. Perhaps because I have an educational background as an engineer, I have to learn logical thinking in everything and only believe in and accept reality based on evidence. Therefore, I have to believe that the Bible says that the Holy Spirit dwells in my heart. Although I believe it with my head, in my heart, because there is no practical basis to prove it, I have no solid way to cite it from my heart that the Holy Spirit dwells in my heart. Even when I first believed in the Lord thirty years ago, I experienced the Holy Spirit saying in my heart: “Believe in the Lord Jesus, and you and your family will be saved.” However, I often asked God in my heart because I had no substantial evidence. “Is it you? Or am I out of my mind and thinking I heard Your voice?” Then, sometimes for no reason, a small voice in my heart gently said, “I AM.” But because I don’t know that this is a voice from God, I let that voice pass come and go from my heart. Gently brushing by without responding to God. It wasn’t until a few years ago that I realized that the true God who created the world wanted to let me know that He was calling me. He wanted me to know that He was real, living in my heart, and could hear my prayers. He can also see everything within my heart and soul and know my thoughts. But I haven’t known or understood His thoughts for more than twenty-some years. Children of God, please don’t be as ignorant as me. When the Holy Spirit moves you in your heart, ask God if He is speaking to you. If the Holy Spirit says to you, “I AM.” Then you can begin to have a dialog with HIM. It’s better if you really can’t hear God speak to you, but it would be a pity if you missed it.

Don’t be afraid, God will talk to sinners. In the darkest days of my life, it was my God who often spoke to me through the Holy Spirit when I doubted whether I really heard HIS voice. Holy Spirit told me, “Don’t be deceived by the evil one.” I was confused in my heart and asked the Lord, “Is it you?” The gentle but majestic voice appeared again and said, “I AM.”

“You have to walk on the narrow road. …”

Think for many days, uncertainly ask, “Is it you, Lord?”

“I AM.”

“My precious blood is enough for you. …”

Think for many days, no idea and ask, “Is it you, Lord?”

“I AM.”

“My name can drive away the darkness in your heart. …”

Think for many days, hopelessly ask, “Is it you, Lord?”

“I AM.”
My soul can then slow to furious and return to normal from the hands of the evil one. I can rely on my Lord and be dragged out by Him. If you ask me, is it real? To this day, there are still times when I feel as if I am dreaming. It is because the phrase “I AM” often appears in my heart. Then, HIS voice becomes an assurance from heaven to me that it is not a dream.

I am not a smart person, and I still feel unworthy. Many times, when God said to me, “I AM.” My tears flow down uncontrollably. Why does a man cry so often? I really don’t understand. Why did the Lord speak to me as an ordinary man personally, confirm to me that He is real, lead me to His arms, and let me kneel down to Him willingly, confess my sins and repent. Or maybe people are too smart and will be like King Solomon. Although he once prayed on the altar that as long as God’s people sin and repent and ask God for forgiveness, he will definitely forgive them. But King Solomon was such a wise man, and his wisdom was given to him by God. However, he only had two times in his life God appeared to him and two more times God spoke to him directly. Who knows how many times in his life that he missed the opportunity from the calling of God? In the end, God clearly told him his sins, but he was unwilling to repent. That was a pity.

Dear readers, do you see GOD? The LORD who created heaven and earth and all things, the true Trinity. HE is my master and my best friend. HE lives, forever lives! Even I kneel down every day shamelessly, I will still hold HIS leg and unwilling to leave HIM. HIS noble, loving and fearful name is “the LORD, GOD of armies”!

Next: Postscript – Assurance From Heaven – “I AM”

Table Of Contents

Previous: A Letter to My Dad (Part 3 of 3)

從天上而來的確據 -「是我」

這星期，在教會的查經班裏，老師提出,「是我」或者”I AM” 是神用來稱呼自己的稱號。我是滿心感謝神的！

我接受主耶穌有三十多個年頭，或者因為自己是工程師的教育背景，凡事都學習邏輯思維，有根有據的現實，才能相信和接受。所以要相信，聖經所講，聖靈是住在我心裏的時候，我雖然頭腦相信，但心裏面，因為沒有現實根據證明，所以說聖靈是住在我心裏，我是冇辦法從心裏去引證的。就算我曾經在三十年前初信主時，經歷聖靈在我心裏說：「當信主耶穌，你和你一家，都必得救。」，我也是經常因為沒有實質的證據，心裏面問神，是祢嗎？還是我神經失常，自以為聽到祢的聲音呢？然後，有時候無緣無故的在心裏，有一微小的聲音，在心裏面輕輕的出現說：「是我。」但是因為我不知道，這是從神而來的聲音，便讓那聲音，從心裏輕輕的擦過，沒有向神作出回應。直到幾年前，我才明白過來，那創造天地的真神，是想說给我知道，祂是在呼喚我，要讓我知道祂是真實的，是活着在我心裏的，是能聽見我的禱告，也能透察我的心腸肺腑的。但我卻二十多個年頭也不知道，聽不懂祂的心意。神的兒女們，請不要學我這樣無知，當聖靈在你心裏感動你的時候，問一問神，是否對你說話，若然聖靈對你說：「是我。」那麼你便可以開始與祂對話了。真的是聽不到上帝對你說話，還好一些，但是錯過了，那便十分可惜了。

不要害怕，上帝是會與罪人對話的，在我一生之中，心靈裏最黑暗的日子，是我的上帝，常常在我懷疑自己，是否真的聽到祂的聲音的時候，籍着聖靈對我說：「不要被那惡者欺騙。」我心裏疑惑，問主說：「是祢嗎？」那輕輕卻是充滿威嚴的聲音再次出現說：「是我。」

「你要走窄路。… 」

想了很久，不確定地問：「主，是你嗎？」

「是我。」

「我的寶血是夠你用的。… 」

想了想久，不明白的問：「主，是你嗎？」

「是我。」

「我的名字，是可以趕走你內心的黑暗的。… 」

想了很久，仍然徬徨地問：「主，是你嗎？」

「是我。」

我的靈魂，才能從那惡者手裏，慢慢地，回復正常，有倚靠的，被主拖着，走出來。若你問我真實嗎？我到現在，仍然有些時候，覺得好像在發夢一般，唯有那一句，常常出現的「是我」，讓我知道那不是一場夢。

我不是一個聰明的人，到現在我仍然覺得不配，很多時候，上帝對我說：「是我」，我的眼淚便不可控的流下來，為何一個男人，卻常常哭泣，我真的不明白。為何主會親自和我說話，向我確認，祂是真實存在的，帶着我走向祂的懷抱，讓我心甘情願的向祂下跪，認罪悔改。又或者人太過聰明，反而會像所羅門王一樣，雖然曾經在祭壇上，禱告說出只要神的子民犯罪悔改，求神饒恕的時候，求祂必定饒恕他們。但所羅門王，這樣有智慧的人，而且他的智慧是神𧶽給他的。但他一生人中，只有兩次，上帝向他顯現，還有另外兩次，上帝的話臨到他。又有誰會知道，他一生裏，錯過了多少次，上帝對他說話的機會呢？最後上帝，明明白白的對他說出他的罪狀，但他也不願悔改，這是十分可惜的。

讀者們，你看見上帝嗎？那位創造天地萬物的主宰，三位一體的真神。我的主人，我最好的朋友，祂是活着的，永遠活着！我就算不要臉地，天天跪下來，也要抱着祂的大腿，不願意離開的那一位，祂尊貴慈愛卻又可畏的名字，是「萬軍之耶和華」！

後記 – 從天上而來的確據 – 「是我」

給爸爸的信 (下)

A Letter to My Dad (Part 3 of 3)

Dad, bringing Mom together with you and going with me to that newer and the most beautiful heavenly world preparing for the children of God. I want to see you all in there. Why do you believe in reincarnation? Why do you want to live again as a human or an animal with uncertainty about what you will become in this world? Why do you want to start all over in a new life again and fight for survival for the rest of it? Is it really good? Come with me to the world of heaven, the holy city, a world whose walls are made of jasper and the city was pure gold like clear glass. The foundation stones of the city wall were decorated with every kind of precious stone. The first foundation stone was jasper; the second, sapphire; the third, chalcedony; the fourth, emerald; the fifth, sardonyx; the sixth, sardius; the seventh, chrysolite; the eighth, beryl; the ninth, topaz; the tenth, chrysoprase; the eleventh, jacinth; the twelfth, amethyst. And the twelve gates were twelve pearls; each one of the gates was a single pearl. And the street of the city was pure gold, like transparent glass. In the middle of its street is a river of the water of life. On either side of the river was the tree of life, bearing twelve kinds of fruit, yielding its fruit every month; and the leaves of the tree were for the healing of the nations. There will no longer be any curse, and the throne of God and of the Lamb (Jesus) will be in it. And there will no longer be any night; and they will not need the light of a lamp nor the light of the sun, because the Lord God will illuminate them, and they will reign forever and ever. There is no temple in the city because the Heavenly Father and the Lord Jesus are the temples of the city. The cowardly, unbelieving, abominable, murders, sexually immoral persons, sorcerers, idolaters, and most important all liars, shall not enter into the holy city, except only those whose names are written in the book of life of the Trinity God who created heaven and earth, can enter. Since there is a better world, why don’t you go with me and see it yourself, you can think of taking a trip with me, going to heaven for a visit? Dad, if you don’t like the holy city, when I leave this world to get there, I have already talked to my Lord Jesus, I’ll follow you wherever you go and never leave you. On earth, I did not listen to what God said in Exodus 20:12: “Honor your father and your mother, so that your days may be prolonged on the land which the LORD your God gives you.” Doing my duty as the firstborn son. For whatever reason, it was my fault for not obeying the Creator. Before I repented, I tried all my efforts to make you and my family not walking in the same living style. Dad, you don’t have to be unhappy, my family has the Spirit of the Lord in their hearts. My son, your grandson, even if he cannot fully understand it now, will love you from his heart in the future. And in eternity, I will never leave you again. When your grandson returns to his heavenly home, he will also understand that what I said today is pleasing to the Lord. Dad, you may question me, being too deeply brainwashed by Christianity, how do you know that world really exists? Dad, because the Lord Jesus really lives in my heart, as long as every day, when I kneel before Him, the blood of the Lord Jesus covers me, and I drive away the evil thoughts in my heart by the name of the Lord Jesus. There will also be turmoil in my heart, then my Lord Jesus has not left me. He has not left me, then He has not said a promise that He cannot keep. So, what the Lord Jesus promised, He will definitely do.

John 14:1-4 records:
“Do not let your hearts be troubled; believe in God, believe also in Me.
In My Father’s house are many rooms; if that were not so, I would have told you, because I am going there to prepare a place for you.
And if I go and prepare a place for you, I am coming again and will take you to Myself, so that where I am, there you also will be.
And you know the way where I am going.”

Although I have never visited the kingdom of heaven, because my Lord Jesus has never forsaken me and forgiven my sins, I can trust Him. Dad, every person who can enter the kingdom of heaven must start by accepting the Son of God—the Lord Jesus. When he admits that he does not know Him, or when he admits that he knows Him, but still sins and offends Him at will, we must ask Him to forgive us. Accepting the Holy Spirit into our hearts, learning to obey the calls of the Holy Spirit, and letting Him teach us to reject evil and choose good, only then can we enter the kingdom of heaven and gain eternal life. In the Bible, the Spirit of God once spoke the following words to a person:

Luke 1:77-79 records:
“To give His people the knowledge of salvation
By the forgiveness of their sins,
Because of the tender mercy of our God,
With which the Sunrise from on high will visit us
To shine on those who sit in darkness and the shadow of death,
To guide our feet into the way of peace.“

For many people, eternal life is just a direct golden ticket to the kingdom of heaven. It is just a guarantee. Those who have never asked the Lord Jesus for forgiveness will not know from the bottom of their hearts that the kingdom of heaven is real, looking forward going to there and meeting the Creator. And the Lord Jesus said in John 3:5:

“Jesus answered, “Truly, truly, I say to you, unless someone is born of water and the Spirit, he cannot enter the kingdom of God.”

I am not God, and I cannot judge arbitrarily. Whether a person can be saved is the power of the Lord Jesus. However, everything that we, Christians, do, think, and say in this world has been recorded by the Creator, and we will definitely be judged when the Lord Jesus returns. Some people will be saved as if they were burned by fire. There is a part of us that the Lord Jesus will tell that He does not know them. Those who are born by the Holy Spirit are the least to worry about because they will continue to experience God’s grace and mercy. The hidden things in their hearts will be revealed by the Holy Spirit, driving us to ask for forgiveness and repentance. Only then will our souls be awakened from it, knowing that we were originally living in the hands of the evil one, self-righteous, but the Lord Jesus still did not give up on us. Only because we understand this undeserved love will we, the Christians, choose to go to the embrace of the Creator. Only such a person has the greatest security and can enter the kingdom of heaven with certainty.

So, Dad, you must admit that you have offended God. If you are not convinced, you can ask the Lord Jesus to replay in your heart all the sins you have done in your life. The Lord will let you know. It is similar to what I asked the Lord Jesus, “Lord, am I free before You?” He then let me lightly and dimly see myself within my heart of my past, let the LORD be blasphemed by the enemy. So that, I can ask Him to forgive me. (The details are recorded in Do I have to seek your advice first?) Don’t be afraid, Dad. The true God who created heaven and earth did it out of kindness so that we humans can see in our hearts that we have offended Him. There will be fear in the first few times, and gradually you will know that the Spirit of God is doing this because of His love for us. The Creator is not like some Christians who have never repented and confessed their sins saying, “We are the children of God, and we will not be judged by God at the end.” Only those who have never asked or forgotten forgiveness from the Lord Jesus will be blinded by the evil one because of the fear that comes from the wounded spirit in their heart. And turned them arrogant and said such words. God does not consider sin innocent. Only when we are forgiven, we, human beings, will have the opportunity to overcome the evil thoughts in our hearts by relying on the guidance of the Holy Spirit, the blood of the Lord Jesus, and by the name of the Lord Jesus. Dad, the God who created the heaven and the earth, He really loves you, if not, my Lord will not remind me again and again! 1 Samuel 15:29 is what He said to God’s people: “Also the Glory of Israel will not lie nor change His mind; for He is not a man, that He would change His mind.” Dad, please don’t be worried and come with me to see Him. All of us in the world, whether willing or not, cannot escape in the end to face the Creator and be judged by our God. I am your eldest son, Dad, follow me and meet our Creator, okay? I was a person who could even give up my own life for my own selfish desires and resentment, just to take revenge on my father. The Lord Jesus still did not abandon me, saved me from resentment, and gave me the grace of regeneration. Also, accept me as His disciple and friend, so He will not abandon you. It is because He once said the following passage and because He did what He said and never abandoned me!

Ezekiel 18:21-23 records:
“But if the wicked person turns from all his sins which he has committed and keeps all My statutes and practices justice and righteousness, he shall certainly live; he shall not die.
All his offenses which he has committed will not be remembered against him; because of his righteousness which he has practiced, he will live.
Do I take any pleasure in the death of the wicked,” declares the Lord GOD, rather than that he would turn from his ways and live?”

Don’t pay attention to what other people say, God loves my sidings, mother, and you. Because 1 Timothy 1:15-16 records:

“It is a trustworthy statement, deserving full acceptance, that Christ Jesus came into the world to save sinners, among whom I am foremost. Yet for this reason I found mercy, so that in me as the foremost sinner Jesus Christ might demonstrate His perfect patience as an example for those who would believe in Him for eternal life.”

I believe that what the Lord Jesus said to me directly will lead me to see all of you to truly know Him. He will rescue all of you from the evil one. If one of you is unwilling to accept the Lord Jesus, confess your sins and repent, you will not be able to leave me alone especially you, Dad. Whether you accept the Lord Jesus or not or are willing or unwilling to go to the kingdom of heaven with me, you cannot abandon me anymore. I have already told the Lord Jesus that I just want to go to the Kingdom of Heaven after leaving this world, to see the home that the Lord has prepared for His people, to see His face, and to ask Him to take me back walking through my entire life again. Let me know what is really happening behind the scenes in some situations, and I will be satisfied. Then, I would rather be with you and be by your side in eternity, whether you choose to live forever or die forever. I, your son, do not have such ability to do what I say. Don’t forget that my Lord Jesus is the true God who created heaven and earth. When He established the laws of the universe, Dad, you and I were not born in this world yet. He can send me to hell, the lake of fire, if He wants to. Now, people all over the world know that I have made a promise to you, do you think I can deny it in front of the true God who created the world? Even then, if I really regretted it, I couldn’t change what I said to the Lord. In front of the true God who created the world, it is impossible to make any change to my promise to you, not to mention that all readers will also testify for me. So, no matter what, you will see me in eternal life or eternal death. At that time, I don’t have to go to work, I have eternal life, and I will be with you. Accept the Lord Jesus, Dad, admit that you did not know Him before, and sinned against Him. Come with me to the kingdom of heaven and meet the true God who created heaven and earth. Dad, in this way, you can prevent me from going to the space of eternal death to meet you. I couldn’t possibly avoid venting that you were so stupid not to believe in the Lord Jesus and accept Him. I will not give you a good time. Dad, go to heaven with me, lest you want to look at my dissatisfied face in eternity.

What’s more, the Lord Jesus once promised me that if I stick to the way He has taught me to endure, when people in the world are being tested, He will keep me from my trials. If I hold on to what He has given me, there is still a crown reserved for me. Although I don’t know why the Lord will prepare a crown for me as an ordinary person and a sinner like me, He can actually have many choices. Choose someone who is better or smarter, or has a lot of knowledge or eloquence, and they are all better than me. So, Dad, I think that day, you will be proud of your son because of the day the Creator gives me the crown, share with me the glory that the Creator possibly gives to your son, okay? In my life, the number of times you have spoken to me is beyond the count of ten fingers. I still have many things that happened to me, and I want to share with you that you will not understand now. You won’t understand until you have experienced forgiveness and regeneration as I have. Dad, when I was young, I followed you and my mother, going here and there. Now I am longing for you to follow me and go to heaven with me. Dad, take Mom, accept the Lord Jesus as your Savior, admit that you have offended Him, and ask Him to forgive you. As long as we are willing to repent, the Lord will certainly forgive us, and He will do what He says. Moreover, we human beings can’t rely on what we know to overcome evil. You don’t have to worry, no one in this world can abandon evil and choose well in his life. What’s more, we don’t even know what sin is. If the Lord hadn’t told me to walk the narrow path, telling me that His precious blood is enough for me, and telling me that by His name, the evil thoughts in my heart can be driven away, how would I, an ignorant person, know? The Lord Jesus is the only begotten son of the true God who created heavens, earth, and all things. He has great power to help those who believe in Him, to abandon evil and choose good, and to be reborn as a man. The Lord Jesus does not need us to do any good deeds to accept us, He only needs us to trust Him. He will let the Holy Spirit lead us to repent and confess our sins in our life and walk toward His narrow path. Dad, believe me, follow me to accept the Lord Jesus as your Savior. The worst outcome is that you will have me by your side, together in the lake of eternal death; but the best outcome is that our family, mom and you, and my younger brothers and sisters, including my son, your grandson, are also in the kingdom of heaven. Dad, share with me what God has prepared for me. Believe in Jesus, follow me to that newer and the most beautiful holy city for eternal life!

Next: Assurance From Heaven – “I AM”

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A Letter to My Dad (Part 2 of 3)

As for us God’s people, although it is hard to admit, the true God who created the heaven and the earth, has already stated that we, His people, are not very reliable. The true God, Yahweh, who created the heaven and the earth, said in Isaiah 42:19-25:

Who is blind but my servant,
and deaf like the messenger I send?
Who is blind like the one in covenant with me,
blind like the servant of the Lord?
You have seen many things, but you pay no attention;
your ears are open, but you do not listen.”
It pleased the Lord
for the sake of his righteousness
to make his law great and glorious.
But this is a people plundered and looted,
all of them trapped in pits
or hidden away in prisons.
They have become plunder,
with no one to rescue them;
they have been made loot,
with no one to say, “Send them back.”
Which of you will listen to this
or pay close attention in time to come?
Who handed Jacob over to become loot,
and Israel (God’s chosen people) to the plunderers?
Was it not the Lord,
against whom we have sinned?
For they would not follow his ways;
they did not obey his law.
So he poured out on them his burning anger,
the violence of war.
It enveloped them in flames, yet they did not understand;
it consumed them, but they did not take it to heart.”

Isaiah 60:21B records:
“They are the shoot I (Yahweh) have planted,
the work of my hands,
for the display of my splendor.”

The teacher is the true God who created all things in the world. It is not the teacher’s fault that the students do not learn well. Moreover, the whole world is in the hands of the evil one. It is just that we think we are smart, but we are a fool and refuse to listen to the teacher’s teaching.

The following words are what my Lord Jesus said to all Christians including me.
Luke 6:27-28, 35-36 records:
“But I say to you who hear, love your enemies, do good to those who hate you,
bless those who curse you, pray for those who are abusive to you.
…
But love your enemies and do good, and lend, expecting nothing in return; and your reward will be great, and you will be sons of the Most High; for He Himself is kind to ungrateful and evil people.
Be merciful, just as your Father is merciful.”

Luke 6:37 records:
“Do not judge, and you will not be judged; and do not condemn, and you will not be condemned; pardon, and you will be pardoned.“

James 2:13 records:
“For judgment will be merciless to one who has shown no mercy; mercy triumphs over judgment.”

Ezekiel 34:16 records:
“I will seek the lost, bring back the scattered, bind up the broken, and strengthen the sick; but the fat and the strong I will eliminate. I will feed them with judgment.”

So when I thought of those who made fun of me openly or secretly, I asked the Lord to have mercy on me and them. When they were sick, I prayed for them; when they had difficulties, if I could help them, I would do it. Until my Lord Jesus comes again, I don’t want Him to be humiliated by the spiritual forces of wickedness in the heavenly places and sad because I am self-righteous and judge others by myself. My Lord Jesus, what he said in the Bible, will judge us for what each of us Christians has done, because the true God who created the heaven and the earth is righteous, and He does not regard guilt as innocent. My God has spoken or by his Spirit the following words, so I believe in Him.

Ezekiel 34:20-22 records:
“Therefore, this is what the Lord God says to them: “Behold, I, I Myself will also judge between the fat sheep and the lean sheep.
Since you push away with your side and shoulder, and gore all the weak with your horns until you have scattered them abroad,
therefore, I will save My flock, and they will no longer be plunder; and I will judge between one sheep and another.“

1 Peter 4:17 records:
“For it is time for judgment to begin with the household of God; and if it begins with us first, what will be the outcome for those who do not obey the gospel of God?”

Moreover, God once promised that those pride, hatred, and evil thoughts that come from the evil one, as long as we, as children of God, are willing to obey God’s will, reject evil, and choose good, those evil thoughts will one day be wiped away and left us by our Lord Jesus. (Detailed in The Lord’s anointing in my heart) I know my position, and I will not be blinded by those scenes of resentment that appear in my heart for no reason, and make my Lord humiliated by His enemy in the heavenly places and sad. Even if I am deceived, my Lord has a way to wake me up because of His name and His love.

Dad, although I love you, it doesn’t mean I am naïve or stupid. Stop trying to deceive me with deceit or tears. You can tell with your lips how miserable you were in the past until tears flow down your cheeks, but your soul cannot lie. It’s no use, Dad! No one can lie to the LORD – the Creator who made heaven and earth because our human souls are created from Him. And He has left the following words by His Spirit in Proverbs 16:2:

“All the ways of a man are clean in their own sight;
But the LORD examines the motives.”

Do you remember? If it hadn’t been for my God to remind me and prevent my brother from committing great sins in His place and offending Him, how would I know? Do you think that if I didn’t stop my brother back then, would my mother, brother, you, and I still be alive today? (Detailed in One Thought Sinking into Hell (Part 1 of 2)) It is impossible for us, human beings, to fight against the God who created heaven and earth, so don’t engage in unnecessary struggles. Do you know? When we human beings say one thing but what we said did not reflect what is truthfully in our heart, our soul can only reflect what we have in our heart, even people who have awakened souls are no exception. In fact, Christians who are unwilling to follow the guidance of the Holy Spirit and convict themselves regarding judgment do not know what they have missed. This is the best opportunity that the Trinity God created the heaven and earth and all things given to us. When a Christian is having godly sorrow and self-hatred, in the process of asking God for forgiveness, and in the process of abandoning evil and choosing good, the soul is helpless and pleads with God to be spiritually cleansed and regain consciousness. Just like the followers of Jesus, Peter and Paul, the Bible also records that they can see through others. Although the awakening of the soul is only a by-product of those who have been convicted by the Holy Spirit regarding judgments and you can only see the reaction of other people’s soul at that particular moment. You cannot possibly know whether the other person will be changed by the Lord Jesus in the future, so it is only a by-product and not very accurate in knowing what exactly the other will be in the future. What’s more, I still have selfishness, so I still find surprises from time to time in other people’s soul reactions after the facts. The most accurate thing is still to ask the Lord for my own or other people’s soul reactions. When the Lord answers me, that is the most accurate determination for all mankind because it is coming from above. So, Dad, even I can see your soul clearly. At that moment, what you expressed, you don’t need to try it in front of the Creator of all spirits——Yahweh. Don’t try to convince me with words or any reason. It’s useless, Dad! It’s really useless! Do you remember a conversation I had with you not too long ago? Do you remember that at that time, I often said to you, telling you to focus on the main points? In fact, at that time, I was reminding you, “Dad, don’t try to take me around an endless circle.” I am not the self-righteous Christian I used to be. Your soul will not lie. This is what the Creator said to me through the Holy Spirit: “You, human, can tell lies with your mouth, and your soul cannot lie.” Even the demons ruling in the sky will reveal their true identity when people command them to answer by the name of the Lord Jesus, “Do you believe that the Lord Jesus is the Son of God, the Word became flesh?”. Even if we, human beings, are given another 10,000 years to study and experience the state of our own or others’ souls, it is still impossible to change the words spoken by the Creator himself. What’s more, we human beings don’t even know that our own soul reaction is laid bare, so that God and people who belong to God and have awakened souls can see through them clearly. Dad, don’t try again, it will not work!

Your sentence: “What I want to do, I have to do it no matter what!”. Have you ever thought about why it often appears in your heart? Why you gave me up and other family members, in exchange for, even your own son, who would rather sell his soul to the evil one, who wants revenge on you, is it worth it? In this world, you are full of thoughts about how to make me burn incense in front of your mourning hall after you die. Dad, you have been tricked by the evil one, do you know? Have you realized that the idea of letting your children gather and offer incense in front of your mourning hall will often come to your mind for no reason, and you feel that it is reasonable to do so, so you try every means, coercion and temptation, give up all your relationship with me and no hesitation, to achieve it? Why does the idea of achieving the goal no matter what, always linger in your heart? You have had previous experience with the spirit world, and you know better than many others that if they don’t see it, they won’t believe it, the spirit world is real. When those thoughts appear: “My children, if they don’t burn incense in front of the mourning hall after my death, I will be ashamed!” If you are not afraid, you can ask those thoughts, do you believe that the Lord Jesus is the Son of God, incarnate. If you pay attention to your inner reaction, you will know it. After knowing the truth, the only advantage is to know that those thoughts do not come from us, are external but exist in our hearts. So, we can choose to follow those thoughts to die, or not to listen to those thoughts, and ask God to keep our heart clean.

Dad, bringing Mom together with you and going with me to that newer and more beautiful heavenly world preparing for the children of God. I want to see you all in there …

Next: A Letter to My Dad (Part 3 of 3)

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A Letter to My Dad (Part 1 of 3)

Dad, I wrote this letter to you. Although I posted this letter on the Internet, I want all readers who read this letter to testify to my commitment to you in this letter. You must read this letter, lest readers all over the world know what I want to say to you, and my father himself does not know.

Do you remember? When I was young, my mom often went to the back mountain of a village for morning exercise. When I was a child, once, for some reason, I wanted to go to the back mountain to find her. Our home is a ten-minute walk away, and I don’t remember how I opened the door and walked out. After two blocks, I suddenly turned around and saw you, Dad, still wearing pajamas, hurried over, grabbed my hand, and took me back home. I don’t remember whether you said anything to me at that time, I only remember your back in pajamas, and I was hold by your hand following you and walking home all the way. Recently, in my heart, there is often that scene of you holding my hand to go home. The Spirit of God often reminds me in my heart: “Your father also loved you sincerely, don’t be fooled by that illusion of resentment that often appears in your heart. When you were controlled by the evil one, I stopped you from making big mistakes and asked you to forgive your father and yourself. My promise still doesn’t change today. Do you remember? I made a promise to you when you first accepted me as your savior, the first time you begged me to rebuke you after you prayed, and fell asleep. Didn’t I say to you, when you believe in the Lord Jesus, you and your family will be saved? After you have been a confused Christian for more than 20 years and repent, am I not asking you to share the gospel with your parents through your son’s mouth? Didn’t I tell you when you later doubted and asked me, you only need to believe in me. Because of my name, I will also save them from the hands of the evil one. You have to seek me first My Kingdom and My Righteousness, and other things will be given to you.”

Dad, do you know that, in the past, my heart was actually full of despair. In despair, I have even more resentment. I used to hate all the false so-called benevolence and love in this world, and I also hated why I was cursed by God, and why I grew up in such a difficult family. Until I met Him, the Lord Jesus who changed my life, the Trinity God who created the heaven and the earth. He also changed my entire soul and promised that if I believed in Him, He will save my parents and sibling to have eternal life in heaven. When His promise first initially resolved the bondage of sin after I truly repented a few years ago. Secondly, I was self-centered in getting along with Him. Thirdly, I couldn’t really love all other God’s children from my heart. Fourthly, the resolution of my fear of suffering, ridicule, being persecuted, and even dying for sharing the gospel. Furthermore, my Lord Jesus made me understand that the precious blood of Him and His name can drive away all kinds of evil thoughts in my heart. The evil thoughts came from the understanding to distinguish between good and evil but just to please my own pleasure. I have already made up my mind to follow my Lord Jesus. In addition, the Lord Jesus did not enslave me. He never shouted at me in my heart. He is the Son of God. With such a noble status, He is legally having the authority to order me as a slave. Instead, He treats me as a friend. My Lord Jesus will only call me to voluntarily repent in my heart. Although I fear Him when He disciplines me. He has always respected me. Even thirty years earlier, He promised me and gave me the promise to lead my father and sidling to accept Him as their personal Savior. (detailed in Struck down, but not destroyed (Part 1 of 4)). At this moment, my heart is no longer bound by resentment and self-pity. Although I am still impatient with you, it is full of gratitude that I have never had before. Thank you my Heavenly Father for putting me to grow up in this family! Thank you Him, twice reminded me, let me prevent my brother from committing great sins against Him. And so, we can survive and have the opportunity to know Him. Thank you my Heavenly Father for calling me in my heart, preventing me from falling into the tricks of the devil, and wanting to perish together with you, Dad! Thank you Him for letting me miss you all the time, and thank you for the family that my Heavenly Father arranged for me on this earth. This family that people in the world who have never been truly forgiven will despise. On the contrary, the Lord Jesus taught me that my parent’s family shall be the most precious to me. So in this life, I shall share the Lord Jesus who gave His life and blood for me. It is a reasonable thing over everything.

When the Lord Jesus let me experience His love and forgiveness many times, although I still hate you for your selfish behavior, for your own purpose and face, even can spread disputes to your own family. We, brothers and sisters of your own blood, do not trust each other. But once, the Lord Jesus let me know that I still love you from the bottom of my heart, Dad! That time, I cried terribly. I didn’t want your soul to go down to hell and be separated from me forever. Although I sometimes hated you, after that day, I realized at the same time how much I hated you. It is the same degree as how much I love you too. You have been making arrangements for yourself after death at your funeral. You want me to offer you a stick of incense in your mourning hall. This will dishonor our Creator. I believe in the true God who created the world, the one who came to this world originally created by Him, saved me from the evil one, and made me a child of God. His words are the Laws and truth of the world and the universe. He said:

Exodus 20:2-6 records:
“I am the Lord your God, who brought you out of the land of Egypt, out of the house of slavery.
You shall have no other gods before Me.
You shall not make for yourself an idol, or any likeness of what is in heaven above or on the earth beneath, or in the water under the earth.
You shall not worship them nor serve them; for I, the Lord your God, am a jealous God, inflicting the punishment of the fathers on the children, on the third and the fourth generations of those who hate Me,
but showing favor to thousands, to those who love Me and keep My commandments.”

Isaiah 43:10B-13 records:
“Before Me there was no God formed,
And there will be none after Me.
I, only I, am the Lord,
And there is no savior besides Me.
It is I who have declared and saved and proclaimed,
And there was no strange god among you;
So you are My witnesses,” declares the Lord,
“And I am God.
Even from eternity I am He,
And there is no one who can rescue from My hand;
I act, and who can reverse it?”

Dad, you once questioned that in this world, so many religions say that what they believe in is the true God, how do you know that the Lord Jesus sharing by Christianity is the true God? Moreover, Christian believers also have many bad people. If the Lord Jesus is the true God, why are there so many hypocritical and self-righteous Christians, and Jesus cannot teach His own believers well? How can Jesus be the true God?

Dad, my Lord Jesus, is the Creator of all things, the Son of God. I have never heard of a God believed in by a religion who can tell a puny believer thirty years in advance that “when you believe in the Lord Jesus, you and your whole family will be saved.” Moreover, if the other so-called gods are true God, why did only the Lord Jesus come, in my heart, reminded me to forgive you and myself, and prevent me from taking revenge on you? (Detailed in One Thought Repent Longing to Heaven (1)) Why don’t other so-called gods come to stop me? Are those gods not godly enough and sleeping? Or do they have to wait for someone else to notify them before they are aware that I’m going to take revenge on you? Or are those gods waiting to see a good show, wanting to see us father and son fight each other? Why can the evil thoughts in my heart be quieted down only when the precious blood of the Lord Jesus covers me? Why is it only by the name of the Lord Jesus that I can drive those evil thoughts out of my heart and dreams? (Detailed in By the Name of the Lord Jesus (Part 1 of 3)) Why can’t I cover and drive away the evil thoughts in my heart by the name of other gods, or by their blood, or by reciting spells? The true God who created the world, there is no distinction between Eastern or Western beliefs. Jesus is the true God who created the world, the only begotten Son of God for all of us. God is willing to send His son to come to this world. In this world, Jesus is looking for lost people like me. People in the world will only spurn or ridicule people who they think are evil or wicked or too difficult to change. On the contrary, my Lord Jesus personally came to find me a sinner, stopped me from sinning, and reminded me that His precious blood is enough for me, and His name can drive away the darkness in my heart. He is reviving my soul and using His name to guide me on the path of righteousness. Can you tell me that is there any more sincere love than this?

In the entire universe, if there are other so-called gods, I will not believe in them. Those gods who don’t know that I am sick, cannot heal me, or turn a blind eye, I have no reason at all to believe in them. There is only the Trinity God I believe in, only Him, and He alone. When people were abandoning me on the surface or secretly, laughing at me in their hearts, or didn’t know how to deal with me, and let me live on my own towards self-dismissal in front of their eyesight. Even when I gave up on myself, He was still in my heart and did not leave me. He pulled me out of the mud, washed my soul, cleansed my heart, so that I could regain my Newborn, and taught me to understand His heart. I only believe in and kneel in front of my Savior Jesus, because He has never abandoned me. I will not do what will shame my Lord and still agree to your request. After you are passing away, in front of the mourning hall, I offer incense to you.

And, Dad, you need to understand two things. Firstly, without the Lord Jesus reminding me in my heart twice, my brother and I were taken back by the Creator early in our life when he planned to find a female for getting married before he repent. Secondly, without the day the Lord Jesus told me to forgive you and forgive myself, your hands would be stained with my blood, and the father would bury his own son. That day, when I entered your home if the Creator hadn’t reminded me through the Holy Spirit, telling me: “Forgive your father and forgive yourself.” I have an 80% to 90% success rate. After what I say to you and when you are in great anger, I will give you a chance to kill me. For the rest of the success rate, while you are in anger, I will grab your hand and stab a knife into my heart. You don’t need to know why I did that, you just need to know that I am your son, and I have passed on the true meaning of your words that you always keep in your heart and become golden sentences, “What I want to do, I will do it no matter what!” I am more ruthless and heartless than you, Dad. I want to take revenge on you, even to give up my own life and the wife and son who love me, no matter what. What I want to do, I will do it no matter what? Is it really worth it? How silly of us, Dad! It’s really two stupid father and son of the same family!

As for us, the people of God, the true God who created the heaven and the earth, he has already explained…

Next: A Letter to my Dad (Part 2 of 3)

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給爸爸的信 (下)

爸爸，帶著媽媽，跟我去那個更新更美的天國世界吧，好嗎？為何要相信輪迴，認為會重生再做一個人或者動物，再次在這個世界裏，重新努苦一世，真的好嗎？與我一同到天國的世界去吧，那個世界，牆是碧玉造的，城是如同明淨玻璃的精金，所建造的。城牆的根基，是用各樣寶石修飾的：第一根基是碧玉；第二是藍寶石；第三是綠瑪瑙；第四是綠寶石；第五是紅瑪瑙；第六是紅寶石；第七是黃璧璽；第八是水蒼玉；第九是紅璧璽；第十是翡翠；第十一是紫瑪瑙；第十二是紫晶。十二個門是十二顆珍珠，每門是一顆珍珠。城內的街道是精金，好像明透的玻璃。那世界的街道當中，更有一道生命河，河邊有生命樹，結十二様的果子，每月都結果子；葉子也可醫治萬民。城內沒有殿，因主上帝－全能者和主耶穌為城的殿。那城內又不用日月光照；因有上帝的榮耀光照，又有主為城的燈。凡不潔淨的，並那行可憎的，膽怯的，不信的，剎人的，淫亂的，行邪術的，拜偶像的，更重要的是，一切說謊話的，總不能進入那世界，只有名字寫在主耶穌，創造天地三一真神的生命冊上的，才能進去。既然有一個更美好的世界，為甚麽不去看看，你就當是跟我去旅行，跟我去天國遊覽一下，若然你不喜歡那裏，到我離開這個世界，到那裏的時候，我已經同我的主講，我要跟著你去你要去的任何地方，永遠不離開你，好嗎？我在地上，沒有聽從上帝在出埃及記20:12節所講的：「當孝敬父母，使你的日子在耶和華－你上帝所賜你的地上得以長久。」盡自己作長子的本分，無論因為甚麽原因，是我的錯，不聽從創造主的話。在我悔改以前，我用盡一切辦法，讓你和我一家，不在同一個生命線上，但你不用不高興，我的一家，有主的靈在他們心裏，我的兒子，現在就算不能完全明白，他將來也會從心裏愛護你的。而且在永恆裏，我不會再離開你了，當你的孫兒，回到天家的時候，也會明白我今天所說的話，是主所喜悅的。你可能會質疑我，被基督教洗腦太深了，你怎會知道那個世界真的存在呢？爸爸，因為主耶穌真的住在我心裏面，只要每一日，我跪下在祂面前的時候，主耶穌的寶血遮蓋我，和我奉主耶穌的名，趕走心裏的惡念，我也會從心裏出現一陣騷動，我的主耶穌便沒有離開我，祂沒有離開我，祂便沒有對我說過一句，祂做不到的承諾，所以主耶穌應許的，祂必定會做到。

約翰福音14:1-4節記載：
「你們心裏不要憂愁；你們信上帝，也當信我(主耶穌）。在我父的家裏有許多住處；若是沒有，我就早已告訴你們了。我去原是為你們預備地方去。我若去為你們預備了地方，就必再來接你們到我那裏去，我在哪裏，叫你們也在那裏。我往哪裏去，你們知道；那條路，你們也知道。」

我雖然末曾到訪天國，我卻能因我的主耶穌末曾離棄我，赦免了我的罪，我可以信任祂。但是爸爸，每一個能進天國的人，必須要的條件，是要從接受神的兒子—主耶穌開始，承認自己不認識祂的時候，或是自認認識祂，卻仍然隨意犯罪得罪祂，我們一定雖要求祂饒恕我們。接受聖靈進入我們心裏，學習聽從聖𩆜的呼喚，讓祂教導我們重生造人，棄惡擇善，我們才能進入天國裏得永生。聖經裏，神的靈曾經在一個人身上，說出以下的一番說話：

路加福音1:77-79節記載：
「叫他的百姓（神的子民）因罪得赦，就知道救恩。因我們上帝憐憫的心腸，叫清晨的日光從高天臨到我們，要照亮坐在黑暗中死蔭裏的人，把我們的腳引到平安的路上。」

永生對很多人來說，只是一個直通車票去天國，只是一個保障，未曾求告主耶穌赦罪的人，是不會從心而發的知道天國是真實的，更不可能享往去天國的世界，朝見創造主。而且主耶穌曾在約翰福音3:5節說：
「我實實在在的告訴你，人若不從水和聖靈生的，就不能進上帝的國。」
我不是上帝，不能妄下判斷，一個人能否得救，那是主耶穌的權能。可是基督徒在世上所做所想所講的一切，創造主已經記錄在案，一定會被主耶穌再來的時候，受審判，有一部份人所做的，會像被火燒一般才能得救，有一部份主耶穌要對他們說不認識他們。要從聖靈生的，才是最不用擔心的，因為一定會不斷經歷，被聖靈照出心中的隱情，求饒恕和悔改。我們的靈魂才會從中被喚醒過來，知道自己，原來是活在那惡者手中，自以為義，但主耶穌卻仍然沒有放棄我們，也只有因為明白這種不配得的愛，才會選擇走向創造主的懷抱。這樣的人，才有最大的保障，一定可以進入天國裏。

所以爸爸，你一定要承認自己，得罪上帝，若然你不服氣，可以求主耶穌，將你一生所做得罪祂的事，重現在你的心裏，主為了祂自己的承諾，祂會讓你看見的，就像我問主耶穌：「主啊，我在你面前，是否自由的？」祂便讓我輕輕的，而且朦朧的，看見自己以前，讓主被敵人褻瀆，讓我可以去求祂饒恕我。（詳情記載在我雖唔雖要問過你？）不要怕，爸爸，創造天地的真神，是出於善意，才會讓我們人類，在心裏看見自己得罪祂的情景。初初的幾次，是會有恐懼的，但是，慢慢地便會知道，神的靈這樣做，是因為愛我們。創造主，並不像一部份，從未悔改認罪的基督徒所說的，「我們是神的兒女，已經不會被神在末後審判的了。」只有從來未曾求主赦免的人，會被那惡者，在心裏因為從靈而來的恐懼，而被那惡者蒙蔽，變成自大，說出這種說話。神並不以有罪為無罪，只有被赦免了，我們人類才會有機會，靠著聖靈的引導，主耶穌的寳血，和奉主耶穌的名字，勝過心裏的惡念。爸爸，創造天地的神，祂是真的愛你，若然不是，我的主不會重覆提醒我！撒母耳記上‬ ‭15‬:‭29‬，是祂親口對神的子民所說的:「以色列的大能者必不說謊，也不後悔。因為他不是世人，他決不後悔。」祂不像我們世人一樣，會反口覆舌，不要害怕，跟我去見祂吧。我們世上所有人，願意也好，不願意也好，我們到最後都不能逃避的，要朝見創造主的面，被神審判。老來從子，我是你的長子，你就跟著我，去見一下，我們的創造主吧，好嗎？我這種為了一己私慾和怨恨，連自己的生命，也可以放棄，只是為了可以向自己的爸爸報復的人，主耶穌也沒有遺棄我，將我從怨恨裏拯救出來，給予我再生之恩，還接受我，作祂的門徒和朋友，所以祂不會遺棄你的，因為祂曾講過以下的一段說話，也因為祂說到做到，也不曾遺棄我。

以西結書18:21-23記載：
「惡人若回頭離開所做的一切罪惡，謹守我一切的律例，行正直與合理的事，他必定存活，不致死亡。
他所犯的一切罪過都不被記念，因所行的義，他必存活。
主耶和華說：惡人死亡，豈是我喜悅的嗎？不是喜悅他回頭離開所行的道存活嗎？」

不要理會別人怎樣講，上帝是愛弟弟，二家姐，媽媽和你的。因為提摩太前書1:15-16節記載：
「基督耶穌降世，為要拯救罪人。」這話是可信的，是十分可佩服的。在罪人中我是個罪魁。
然而，我蒙了憐憫，是因耶穌基督要在我這罪魁身上顯明他一切的忍耐，給後來信他得永生的人作榜樣。」
我相信主耶穌對我親口所講的說話，祂會帶領我，看見我們一家，去認識祂。將我們父母一家，從那惡者手裏救出來的。若果你們有一個不願意接受主耶穌，不願意認罪悔改，你們也不能夠撇下我的了。特別是你，爸爸。你接受或不接受主耶穌也好，願意或不願意跟我去天國也罷，你也不能夠撇下我。我已經和主耶穌說了，我只想離開這個世界以後，親身去天國裏看一看，那個主為祂的子民所預備的家，見一見祂的面，求祂帶我回看我一生，讓我知道在一些情況裏，究竟背後，真正發生甚麽事情，我便知足了。然後，我寧願在永恆裏，與你在一起，在你身邊陪伴你，無論你是選擇永生或永死。你的兒子我，沒有這樣的能力，講到便做到，但是不要忘記，我的主耶穌，是創造天地萬物的真神，祂定宇宙天地的法則的時候，爸爸，你和我都未出生在這世上。祂只要願意，便可以送我到永死的火湖裏。現在全世界的人，也知道我向你許下承諾，你認為我，可以在創造天地的真神面前抵賴嗎？就算那時候，我若果真的後悔，也不能夠改變我對主所說的話了。這在創造天地的真神面前，已經是不可能再有改變餘地的承諾了，更何況所有的讀者，也會為我做見證，所以無論如何，你在永生或永死裏，也會見到我，到時我不用去工作，有永恆的生命，和你在一起了。接受主耶穌吧，爸爸，承認自己以前不認識祂，犯罪得罪祂。跟我一同到天國裏去，朝見創造天地的真神吧。爸爸，這樣，你可以避免我到永死的空間，見到你的時候，因為你這樣蠢，寧願死都不願意信奉真神，我初初見到你的時候，避免不了會發洩我對你這樣蠢的做法的不滿，是不會給你好面色看的。爸爸，跟我去天國吧，免得你在永恆裏，要睇我不滿的面色。

更何況主耶穌曾應許我，我若持守祂所𧶽我忍耐的道，在天下人受試煉的時候，保守我免去我的試煉。若然我持守祂所𧶽我的，還有冠冕為我存留，雖然我不知道，為何像我這樣一個罪人，一個平凡的人，主也會為我預備冠冕，祂其實可以有好多選擇，選一個好些或聰明一些的，或者有很多學識或有口才的，也比我好。所以，爸爸，我想那天，你會因為創造主賜我冠冕那一天，為你的兒子引以為榮，與我分享那份創造主賜給你兒子的榮耀吧，好嗎？我一生中，你同我講話的次數，十隻手指數埋都沒有，我還有很多發生在我身上的事情，想對你說，是你現在不會明白的。直到你同我一樣，經歷赦罪和重生之後，你才會明白的。爸爸，小的時候，是我跟著你和媽媽，去這裏那裏。現在我卻渴望你們跟著我，跟我去天國裏。爸爸，帶著媽媽，接受主耶穌作你們的救主，承認自己得罪祂，求祂饒恕你吧，只要我們人願意悔改，主也必然會饒恕我們，祂是言出必行的。而且我們人類，根本沒有可能靠自己所知道的，去勝過罪惡，你不用擔心，這個世上，沒有一個人做到，一生裏能棄惡擇善。更何況，我們連甚麼是罪也不知道。若果不是主叫我走窄路，說給我知道，祂的寳血夠我用，對我講，可以奉祂的名，趕走內心的惡念，我這個無知的人，又怎會知道？主耶穌是創造天地萬物真神的獨生子，祂有大能力，幫助信靠祂的人，棄惡擇善，重生做人。主耶穌，根本不需要我們做到甚麼善事，才會接受我們的，祂只要我們信任祂。祂會在我們一生裏，讓聖靈帶領我們悔改認罪，走向祂的窄路的。爸爸，相信我，跟我去接受主耶穌，作你的救主吧。最差的結果，你也有我在你身邊，一同在永死的火湖裏；但最好的結局，卻是我們一家，爸爸媽媽，和我的弟弟姐姐，更包括你的孫兒也在天國裏，與我一同分享神給我預備的。相信我，跟我去那個更新更美的永生世界吧，好嗎？

從天上而來的確據-是我

給爸爸的信 (中)