Introduction / 引言
This blog is created for the intention of sharing my Lord Jesus Christ to anyone visiting my blog and the moments that I realized He is living within my life. After a couple of years of blogging, I decided to give a better introduction of myself and the reason I shared my testimonies walking with Jesus in my blog.
I grew up in a family that didn’t have much time to care about their children’s growth. My parents both had to work every day, and they didn’t have much time to pay attention to us or talk and communicate with us. For more than twenty years before I truly accepted the Lord Jesus as my Savior, I only acknowledged with my mouth that Jesus is Lord, but in my heart, I believed in myself more than I believed in Jesus as my refuge and Redeemer.
That doesn’t mean I didn’t go to church or fellowship meetings. On the contrary, I went often—but deep down, I didn’t truly feel I needed Jesus to atone for my sins.
Until one day, my younger brother in Canada, being naïve, fell into the devil’s trap. He thought he might not like women but might like men, and eventually became a homosexual. On top of that, my relationship with my parents started to fall apart. That’s when the devil found his chance to enter my heart.
At that time, some Christians who knew what was going on would look at me with smirks—lips slightly raised, mocking expressions that they tried to hide. Some whispered among themselves, then looked at me and laughed. My heart became filled with resentment. I hated myself for being born into such a family, hated being mocked by self-righteous people, hated having to face such a life.
Eventually, when I stopped resisting that hatred and let it merge with my soul, long story short—I sought revenge on my father. When I was about to enter my parents’ house to carry out my final revenge, the Lord spoke to me in my heart at that very moment:
“Forgive your father. And forgive yourself.”
That was when I realized the Lord had been watching over me all along. He awakened me at the most critical moment so I wouldn’t fall into deception and do something irreversible—something the devil wanted me to do.
When I understood that the Lord loved a sinner like me and had shown me grace, the Holy Spirit helped me revisit my past experiences and see my own faults. I asked the Lord, “Lord, someone like me—who would go so far just to get revenge on my parents—would You still want me?”
And the Lord graciously said,
“I love you.”
This wasn’t the kind of “I love you” people say when they’re powerless to help. When the Lord said, “I love you,” it was as if He said:
“My child, I know both your light and your darkness, yet I still love you.”
At that moment, realizing the Lord still loved me, I wept and asked for His forgiveness from the bottom of my heart. Maybe because I am stubborn, after I repented, the Lord often let the Holy Spirit shine an eternal light from heaven upon my heart, reminding me of my past and showing me my sins, so that I could seek forgiveness. Strangely, once I asked for His forgiveness, those sins were wiped away from my heart.
At that time, I thought I had become better. But when I asked the Lord from my heart, “Lord, am I truly free in Your eyes?” the Lord showed me something while I was reading the Bible—something faint and unclear, but I knew for sure that I had once given the enemy of God a chance to slander Him. I knelt on the ground, wept, and asked for forgiveness.
I realized that even when I had offended God so deeply, He was still willing to forgive me. He let me know my wrongs so I could ask for His mercy, so that He could pour out His grace. For me as a child of God, judgment is not for condemnation—but for grace. That’s the truth the Lord taught me.
Because I have been forgiven much, I am willing to listen and change. The Lord understands me more than I understand myself. If He had shown me exactly which sins offended Him, I might have only changed that one thing. But now, since I don’t know exactly what it was, whenever I read Scripture and realize I’ve done wrong by the power from the Spirit of God, I’m willing to change in every way—just so my loving God will not be dishonored because of my sins.
Later, the Lord let me understand that He has confined all people under sin so that He might show mercy to all. I began learning to forgive those who had wronged me. Those who mocked me before—when they fell sick or faced hardship—I remembered that the Lord will one day judge them for mocking others. But He still wanted me to pray for them and help them when they were in need.
A few years ago, the Holy Spirit began moving me to share the gospel with my parents. I was hesitant, until one day my young son said to me with authority, “Daddy, you need to tell Grandpa and Grandma about Jesus!” Then I knew for sure the Lord wanted me to preach to my parents. Even when I doubted whether this was truly from God or just my own wish, the Lord never abandoned me. When I read the Bible and prayed, He encouraged me to keep going—to not give up sharing the gospel with my parents because of difficulties.
One day, while reading the Bible, I came across the story of Joseph telling his brothers that all his sufferings were actually God’s way of saving their whole family. Suddenly I understood—the Lord allowed me to be born into this family so that my family could be saved. The Lord has a plan and a purpose for me. He knows I can walk this difficult path with His help and become a testimony within my family.
Who doesn’t want a smooth life? But the Lord chose for me a path where I must rely on Him daily—so that I might proclaim His grace all my life. Even when I fall, He will not let me be utterly defeated. He allowed me to come from humble beginnings to display His glory, so that I might become a vessel for Him, proclaiming the truth of Mark 2:17:
“When Jesus heard it, He said to them, ‘Those who are well have no need of a physician, but those who are sick. I came not to call the righteous, but sinners.’”
I once didn’t understand why the Lord would use someone like me. But now I know—it’s because He has always been watching over me. If He hadn’t stopped me Himself, I would have long walked down a path of no return. He let me see my past sins so that I could repent and be forgiven by His grace. The Lord watches over me every day. If He didn’t, how could He have spoken to me that day when I was about to enter my parents’ house, saying, “Forgive your father, and forgive yourself”?
He even allowed me to faintly see all the wrongs I had done throughout my life so that I could seek forgiveness and He could grant me mercy.
I love following my Lord. When He taught me, “You don’t need human wisdom to proclaim My glory. You only need to tell others how I showed grace to you and how I saved you anew. Then I will receive the glory due to Me in the hearts of those I have chosen,” I finally understood.
Later, when I read Isaiah 55:13, I realized this was the Creator’s promise and a testimony of His truth:
“Instead of the thorn bush shall come up the cypress; instead of the brier shall come up the myrtle; and it shall make a name for the Lord, an everlasting sign that shall not be cut off.”
If I had not experienced the Lord’s forgiveness, I would still be someone who judged others and criticized the world’s corruption. But now I know—the Lord loves sinners. Therefore, I also want to love those I once disliked with that same faithful love that never abandons. Even though my life may not look honorable, the Lord can still use me as a testimony of His grace, that He may be glorified.
The Lord who created heaven and earth—His majestic and awe-inspiring name is “The Lord of Hosts.” He must increase; I must decrease. My Lord, my best friend, is worthy of all my praise for life. Only He can use what seems foolish in the eyes of man to reveal His real presence and mighty power. That is the wisdom of God.
Friends who visit this blog, do you see it? The Son of God, Jesus Christ, who came to this world more than two thousand years ago, was crucified for the sins of all mankind. He rose again on the third day, and though He ascended to heaven, He still lives through the Holy Spirit in the hearts of all believers. Even today, when we are unaware, He still personally saves sinners. And whenever He saves a sinner, He walks with them, teaches them to follow Him, and never leaves them.
This is my story, shared simply with you. I hope you can now understand why I am witnessing Jesus as a Living God online. It is because the Lord Himself came to me—lifted me out of the mud, did not despise me, but washed me clean with His precious blood, teaching me what it means to be justified by faith.
As long as we truly believe, He will forgive, heal, and walk with us—fulfilling His promise of Immanuel: God with us.
#Immanuel
#JustifiedByFaith
#WeAreLaidBareBeforeGod
#JudgmentIsForGrace
#WeLoveBecauseHeFirstLovedUs
Christian Faith Discussion 